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Big Dreams, Small Expectations
A big comfy house, a nice shiny car, and all the nice things needed to survive were my mother’s American dream. “I always wanted my own house, my own set of cars, and all my necessities”, my mother stated. To my surprise, my mom described my exact definition of the American dream. When I finish school my ultimate dream of living in the United States is to be able to have my own big house and my own car. To me this is the definition of a happy life, to be able to have somewhere to rest your head every night. This is when I realized the significance of everything my mother went through and why it was important. It was too give my older sister and I a good education, for us to be able to learn new things day by day and push ourselves forward for having a good future. “ I’m still surprised that the house still stands in good condition today because it’s like a memory no one will ever take away from me.” my mom added. Just like my mom, I’m also very glad that this house still stands today because just like her I have also shared so many memories there. We have spent many Christmases with my grandparents in that house, we have held reunions in that house, and that was the also the house where my grandma took her last breaths and I was able to be a part of her last goodbye along with many family members inside the little worn down house.
Soon after my mom mentioned her American dream to me, I asked her about her dream and goals she had when she was younger. “I wanted to become a teacher, I always loved teaching, but I felt like I was never set out to actually be one because I didn’t receive the education for it “, she implied. I became shocked to hear this because when I was also younger, my ultimate dream was to become a teacher as well. My parents bought me a whiteboard so that I can pretend to be teaching my pile of stuffed animals. I began to see how different things were in here years as a teenager because I have the opportunity to continue high school and receive a degree in teaching while my mom never had that opportunity because the school was too expensive to pay. When coming into the United States her goals were to work, to earn money, and to push forward in life to survive. Everything for her changed when crossing the border, she began to realize all the different situations she was in and the limited opportunities she was able to take.
Family in Mexico was a difficult to cooperate with. In a small house of only two rooms lived a family of ten, eight children and a mother and a father. Some children would have to sleep on the floors and others on beds, but each child had to do their part and help out around the house and work to help with the rent. “We would help our mother cook, feed the chickens, water the plants, and we would go to the fields to help our dad divide out the work between the eight of us“, my mom added. “Everyday our dinner would consist of beans and tortillas, it would be very rare the days that we had the chance to eat meat “, she said as she looked down at her hands slightly smiling. When pointed this out, it made me comprehend how ungrateful I can act sometimes. When my mom cooks her main dishes always consists of beans and I can remember that most of the time I would complain about having the same food all the time. Now I realize that as my mom was growing up, she didn’t have an option with food, and now that I do, I chose not to eat it rather than realizing that I have to work with the only thing my parents are able to offer me.
My mother never received a proper education in her time living in Mexico; she was only able to finish seven years of school. When I asked my mom why she wanted to school, she commented, “ To always be able to study no matter where I go.” So much has changed during her time in school and my time in school today. I realize that I have the chance to be educated, I have the chance to be able to put my knowledge to use and also use my mom’s opportunities as guides for a better education. Part of the reason why my mother wasn’t able to finish school was because she had to work in unsanitary reeking dirty fields to be able to provide for her family. Comparing myself to her, I have found that I have it easy because my parents are able to provide for me with the things I need whether its food or materialized things and still have the privilege to attend school.
Back in Mexico living conditions were different as well as here in the United States. At age 16 my mom’s parents decided to bring her into the United States. My mother wasn’t like the many who decided to make the journey here alone. The reason my grandparents brought my mom over was because they always believed that there was more opportunity in the US and that If they wouldn’t be able to give them a good future, they knew that living in the United States they would be able to give themselves their own future. “Our parents decided to bring us over here to be able to work. But it became difficult at times because at age 16 I couldn’t be able to get a well paying job so I would have to say I was 18 to be able to work and to provide for myself “, countered. “ we didn’t have much of food, or clothes, and we wouldn’t earn enough money. Here we are able to work, were able to eat, and to survive “, she added. I found it interesting that my mom mentioned working first before eating because in a way she was trying to tell me that I have to work for what I want no matter what it is.
“I realized that I had changed when my first daughter was born. I realized that I no longer had to worry about myself but for another human being that I had to be responsible”, my mother told me when I asked her how her life had changed or when she realized that she wasn’t the same person who crossed the border at age 16. I am aware that as I start growing up I will feel the same way my mother did by taking on all the responsibilities that will come my way. For example, paying for college, paying for a car, for food, and to be able to maintain myself while I live on my own. “And that was the main thing my parents taught me, to be responsible, to not be selfish, and to always give back”, she states. As she mentioned each value I realized that these are also the lessons my mother is trying to teach my sister and I with everything she does for herself and for her family. She’s trying to give us all the good she can with the limited things she has to offer.
“We live off our jobs, so much better than before, it obviously a lot better, I’m not rich, I’m not poor, but I’m happy with what I have because I have worked so hard for everything, nothing was ever handed to me and that has to be the biggest thing I’m most proud of today”, she claimed. This is what my mother stated when I asked her how her life was all about today. To hear these words from my mother made me a little teary eyed because I was able to relive a little piece of history with her. She was able to teach me lessons, morals, and values with this interview without her even knowing it and this interview honestly gave me a new perspective on my mother. I realized that my mom might not be living her ultimate American dream, which was overall becoming a teacher and being able to receive an education, but at least she’s happy with what she was able to work hard for. She was able to make it in a country of opportunity and was able to raise a family as well as give back to her family as much and she possibly could. She has taught me to be able to find my own happiness and to always push forward in life. To be responsible and to be grateful for everything I have today. Thanks to this interview I have become closer to my mother because just as much as she tries to understand me, I now understand more of her than I ever did before.
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For this piece, I interviewed my amazing mother and through this process I was able to understand who she was more clearly than just seeing her as a person who carried the titile of a mom.