I’m sitting at my computer listening to “Love Like War” by All Time Low and snapchatting the girl I’m currently enamored with. It’s late and I need to be up early for Play Practice. I recently quit the only remaining “sport” that I was involved with (Golf) in hopes of getting a job and guess what? No job. Hey, look. A text from that girl who led me on really hard core a few months back! I’ll just ignore that! Oh, what’s this? Another text from one of my friends who’s in a tight depressive downward spiral.

Ooh, now the song changed! “Coffee’s For Closers” by Fall Out Boy.

This is my life. It’s annoying. It’s stressful. I’m in a gajillion things and quitting half of them just in an attempt to add more. My friends are a handful, my lovelife is… well, honestly? It’s pretty cliche. Chemistry sucks.
These are the thoughts in my head. But recently, the biggest thought?
F***. I’m an upperclassman. Soon I’m out of here. And sooner, a handful of my best friends in the world are out of here.
Being a Junior sucks. Being a senior’s probably even worse.

“Spin Me Around” By Patent Pending..
I listen to music when I write.

I’m tired. I’m stressed. I’m not ready.
The thought in my head is like this: Damn. This part of my life is coming to a close.
Now, is that so bad? What’s wrong with that? Where’s your sense of adventure?
It’s here, God Damnit! I don’t f***ing want new friends! I don’t want a break from the drama! I don’t want to think that that last speech contest was my best friends actual Last Speech Contest (note the use of capital letters).
I don’t want to think that I’ll lose any chance I have with this amazing girl. I don’t want to live on my own. I don’t want to eat ramen noodles every day!

“Cynical Skin” By Get Scared.

What’s the point of growing old?
Truth is, it scares the s*** out of me.
I’m having the time of my life.
And sure, the time of my life sucks, but you know what? I wouldn’t want it any other way.

The flirting going on on my snapchat is out of this world.

People always say teenagers overreact to bad situations. They act like it’s the end of the world. Well, there’s actually a scientific reason for that. The maturation of the brain during the teenage years causes a rise in some sort of hormone in the brain that actually increases our fear or something. I don’t know, look it up.

“Broken” By Lucky Boys Confusion.

The point is, saying that we react like it’s the end of the world is completely accurate. Because it is. This is the end of our world.
Especially when we leave the comfort of the drama and the hormones and the awkwardness and the stress and the business and the dependance and the parents in their own bedrooms down the hall for a world that is completely new and absolutely terrifying.
I know what I want to do after high school.
But that doesn’t mean I want to leave High School.

“Stairway to Heaven” By… Well, you probably know. (Led Zeppelin)

I want to go to the University of Northern Iowa to major in English and minor in Education so I can teach English.
Clever, no?
See, I don’t intend to leave high school. Not really.
I’m addicted to it.
The smell of a** and old spice in the locker rooms, the three attempts hourly to open my locker, the teachers I don’t like.
I don’t know what I’d do without it.

Damn, this song is long.

So I guess College will kind of be my rehab.
But I fully plan to relapse.

Snapchat Caption from (girl whose name shall remain secret): What was your favorite part of today?

Interesting question.

“Three Cheers for Five Years” by Mayday Parade.

After careful consideration, I decide not to say that I’ve written my feelings about my life. Or the bonding experience I had with my three best friends earlier.
Instead, this was the caption: I got a new Magic card I’ve been wanting for a while.

So that’s me.

I hope you appreciate what I’ve said.
But if you don’t, that’s cool too. I honestly don’t give two s***s.