My life has not taken the course I would have chosen for myself. In my dream world, I would live in a happy, healthy family who would never worry about money. My parents would still be married, and my father would be a nice man. We would all live together in a nice little white house that would sit on a grassy, green hill. The sun would always shine and there would always be warm smiles on our faces. Our eyes would show no pain and wet tears would never stream down our faces. However, this is reality. I have been dealt a drastically different hand of cards, and I have had to deal with it. My parents are divorced, and I strongly dislike my father. My mom is constantly worrying about our financial situation, and every member of my family has some sort of mental illness.

The biggest struggle in my life has been my relationship with my dad and the things that he did to me and my family. My dad emotionally abused everyone in my family for years, and sometimes it would turn into physical violence. Everyone in my family was terrified of him, and we didn't know how to act around him. I was young, and I didn't understand that not every father behaved like this. I didn't know that his actions were wrong. This naivety came to haunt me when he began to sexually abuse me.

We would be snuggling in my bed, and his cold hands would touch me in places that should not be touched. I would lie still, too petrified to move. I would try to concentrate on the cool, soft sheets or the fluffy stuffed animals that lived on my bed. I didn't know that these moments together were wrong was wrong, so I never told my mother. It wasn't until I learned about abuse in school that I realized what was going on in my household.

My father was arrested six months later for being an Internet predator. I had the option of testifying to the abuse so that he could be charged for that as well, but I chose not to. He was already getting punished, and there was no point in punishing him even more if he already knew what he did. In my mind, punishing him would have made it much harder to forgive him. I was nine at the time. I was already beginning to think of the bigger picture in life, even at such a young age.

I believe that life is what you make it. I believe in the whole “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade” philosophy. I am thankful for all of the hardships I have been through because they have molded me into a very unique person. I have been able to counsel my friends through their issues because I have been through the same problems. Instead of dreaming that my problems didn't exist, I let them help me become a better person. I have taken the imperfections in my life and used them to shape who I am today.