Last summer at church camp my life changed forever. It was the day I discovered who I was and now I am truly different. All my life I had lived in a religious home, but my Christian faith was never put into use. Unfortunately, by the time I got to middle school I placed everything my parents had shaped me to be behind me. Without thought, I started living two lives. When I was with all my friends I found myself doing everything I possibly could to impress them and feel accepted. My one and only goal was to become popular and I was willing to do whatever it took to achieve that goal. The way I dressed, the way I talked, every aspect of my life was influenced by this goal. Immediately after I got home I changed to the perfect daughter that on the outside seemed to have everything under control. Obediently, I would go to church every Sunday where I would sing along to all the songs, pretend to listen to all the sermons, even attend many church events. In my heart I truly believed God was real, but I cared too much about the world’s point of view and what they thought of me to put that belief into action.

Gradually, my life around my friends started intervening with my life at home. I couldn’t determine who I was and I was confused. For some reason everything I had worked for and the goal of popularity I wanted to achieve didn’t seem so important anymore. Having all the cutest clothes and obtaining lots of friends didn’t fill up the emptiness inside me no matter how hard I tried. Loneliness overwhelmed me even though I was surrounded by numerous people. Sometimes it felt like I wasn’t there anymore; my mind was so absorbed in my thoughts that I didn’t even know who I was. My friends were always asking me what was wrong and my parents were just as puzzled as me. Little by little the Holy Spirit was planting a seed in my heart and the only thing I had to do was let it grow.

When I arrived at church camp that summer I was a wreck. I was exhausted with life and unsatisfied with the way I was currently living. The only reason I even went to camp was to have a fun time with my friends. I wasn’t expecting any change to occur in me, but God had something else in mind. During the last night of camp, as I was singing along to the worship song, I finally realized what I needed; I needed God. Popularity, money, and everything else the world was offering wasn’t giving me everlasting happiness. All they offered me was momentary happiness until I started wanting more. It was only through God that I could experience true joy that would last forever. Feeling overwhelmed from my emotional discovery, a tear started to rim the bottom of my eye lid and soon the tears wouldn’t stop. I sobbed uncontrollably as I let my old life go and accepted the new life God offered me. Eagerly, I devoted my life to God that day and I’ve walked in faith ever since.

Living every moment of my life for God isn’t easy. It’s difficult being different and taking the road less traveled, but when I look back at the life I used to live I know I made the right choice. God has made such a difference in my life by changing the way I live, giving me a new motivation that I never had before, and filling me with so much grace I’m overflowing with joy. My goal now is to walk in the footsteps of Jesus and to make a difference in the lives of everyone around me. When I stumble and just want to give up I remember Hebrews 13:5 which says “...I will never leave you nor forsake you.” This verse pushes me along in whatever I want to achieve and God is my motivation. That day at camp not only did I become a new person, I figured out who I am; I am Sabrina Sissom the daughter of the one and only, never changing God.