As each day passes, college looms closer; I feel a cage of expectations shrinking in on me—gloating—as I flail about in my daily activities. And if this metaphorical cage were real, I’d be in a panic attack right now—clutching my throat as I heave in and out, in and out—gasping for breath, praying for peace, and looking for a way out. 

Ever since my debut into high school, parents and peers alike have bombarded me with life-deciding questions like: what are you studying in college? or what job do you want? or which colleges are you aiming for?—answers that, if true, would shape my entire future’s path. As if a teenager knows the exact plan for the next 65 years of their life. 

Needless to say, my answers for desired major changes every month: computer science, economics, psychology, creative writing, French, film, kinesiology, and more. 

Yet, the fact remains that the topic of this year has been: college.

My to-do lists laugh at me as I leave task after task unchecked: driver’s license, internship applications, volunteer work, SAT practice, AP studying, college counseling meetings… all in hopes of building up a good rapport for one thing: college. 

The ticking bomb—that is—college applications lurk in every shadow of my life. 

After all, it is not about going to a college; it is about getting into the right college. The college that will set me up for success, the college that will make my parents proud—expectations, expectations, expectations.

The binding pressure to get straights As, score adequately on standardized tests, commit to every extracurricular, and stand out in an impressive light—endless expectations like these leave even the most determined of kids anxious and dejected—it’s all too much for me. 

Achieving a satisfactory score on standardized exams is a minefield of expectations for students—especially in a school filled with excelling and hardworking and excelling students.

I know many students who take standardized tests several times with the hopes of achieving a perfect score—36 on the ACT, 1600 on the SAT, 5 on the AP exam. 

“I've heard stories about students scheduling an emergency meeting with college counseling if they don't get the score they want… I find it rather suspicious that [our school's] students only talk about their scores when they are above 1590” says Anon A ’24

The idealization of perfection is a palpable pressure. As the narrative of perfect scores prowls amongst students’ mind and becomes the norm, it poisons students’ perceptions of what exactly is an acceptable score. Persisting worries, festered and combined with comparison, can destroy students’ self esteems. 

As it is said, the pressure of preparing for college applications can be detrimental to students’ mental health. Stakes are high, competition is fierce, and I can feel my confidence deteriorating as I pick apart pieces of myself until I’m no longer there. 

To those who feel disheartened and gloomy in this uphill battle against constant expectations: remember that your test scores, grades, and resumes do not truly define your self-worth or intelligence. 

Neither does the name of your future college. 

“People in high school work so hard to get into college, but college shouldn’t be the goal,” says Anon B ’26. 

While Ivy League schools, in particular, are often seen as the ultimate goal for students, I do not believe high-ranked colleges are worth sacrificing one’s health and sanity. Prestigious schools may come with a good reputation, a pat on the back, and congratulations—but I will never allow my 77-year (predicted) lifespan to center around attending the best college. 

Sometimes, the key to unlocking a cage lies within yourself. My escape is found through a balance of exceeding expectations and taking care of my mental health, though yours may be different.

“There’s several paths to success and happiness, and not all of them include college,” says Anon C ’24.

Remember: college is not the end-all-be-all. 

College is just one step in a person’s life—and many different paths lead to success.