Ihear the phone ringing, a very loud, high-pitched ring,
A ring that gets toyour very last nerve.

I hear the voice on the other end, usually a harsh,stern voice,
but this time a very soft, quiet voice.

I hear the voicespeak, very softly, very softly.
The words hit me like a ton ofbricks.

They hit me as hard as a bullet would,
And I feel the pain as Iwould if someone had ripped out my still-beating, loving heart.

I sitthere for a few moments, letting the words sink in,
Letting them penetrate mymind.

I go to the hospital, nervous and sweating;
Scared of what I amabout to see, scared of what has happened.

Oh, God! Why is this happening?Why is this happening to me?

I see so many faces staring at me with eyessaying, Sorry,
Saying they feel my pain, but how could they?

I see myfather standing there;
White as a ghost, crying, breathing heavily.

Isee my mother lying there, not white or pale as I thought she would be,
Butrather a tan color against the white sheets.

I see her so peaceful now,not in any pain
Just the peaceful mother I had known.

I feel the tearswell up in my eyes;
they stream down my face, no stopping them now.

Ifeel my body start to shake, my legs feeling as if they are made of jelly;
Myhands shaking uncontrollably.

I feel the warm, comforting hands of myfather, helping me to stand,
Helping me to know everything will beokay.

I feel the hands of all my loved ones;
Telling me it will bealright, telling me they love me.

As I watch them take my mother away, Ithink, this is the last time I will see my mumfy;
The last time I would haveanyone to call my mother.

I sit and think of all the memories of her,
all the good, happy times. Her radiant smile, twinkling eyes.

Butthere are none;
The only memories I have are ones when she was sick andwracked with pain.

I try not to think of my mother like that,
I want tothink of her joyful, free of worries. Not in pain. It's hard.

As I sithere writing this I can't help but cry,
Tears of joy, tears of pain.