Jokes are meant to make people laugh. They’re meant to be funny, to brighten someone’s day. They’re not supposed to be serious nor at someone’s expense. It’s a really simple concept that I feel is lost sometimes.

I go to a religious school. I have been my entire life since I come from a Christian family. I am very much a Christian myself and devote my life to God in every way I can see fit. In recent years, I have become more aware of the blatant homophobia that exists. I know it’s common knowledge that religious people aren’t for gay people, but I didn’t used to think that. I grew up in a very progressive family who taught me that the God I believed in loves everyone, no exceptions. By the time I hit sixth grade, kids were telling me otherwise. It only got worse from there.

Homophobic jokes were made on the regular. Calling things or people “gay” was acceptable, so much so that I’ve done it myself (which I do regret). People would call their male peers gay if they showed an ounce of femininity. When I first heard all this, I tried to stand up for what I thought was the right thing. When it would happen, I’d politely tell the person making the joke to stop or that it wasn’t funny. Later, I excused it all because it was their beliefs and I wanted to respect that, but it was hard because they couldn’t show the same amount of respect to anyone who’s apart of the LGBTQ+ community.

There’s also perspective. None of the people who are joking like this think about the long run. The statistics of them knowing someone who’s gay, being related to an LGBTQ+ individual, are high and what will happen if their best friend ends up being that way? Their brother? Their future children? It’s a very sad reality that my friends do not like these people and it’s taken me awhile to understand.

I’ve had non-Christian friends, Christian friends, gay friends, straight friends. I even had a friend who was transgender. Most of these friends I made when I was eleven or twelve, so I still had the mindset that it wasn’t considered “wrong”. I still try to keep that mindset, but it’s hard. Christians are great people and I’ll never say otherwise, but we need to take into account how big our influence is. If someone’s afraid they’ll never get to be themselves because of what is believed to be true of the Bible, then they’ll go their whole lives pretending to be something they’re not. I believe a true Christian loves everyone. I’m not asking you to agree with everyone, but to love and accept that that’s who they are. That’s how God made them to be.