Feedback on "A Day in the City" | Teen Ink

Feedback on "A Day in the City"

May 8, 2016
By MangaisLife SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
MangaisLife SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
9 articles 0 photos 3 comments

     In the poem, “A Day in the City” by Lindsy Weyrick, a story about a little girl that got shot is told. She was very young and at the age where ponytails were still in fashion. All she was doing was having fun in the park while her mother watched “full of love and admiration, for the little girl growing up too fast” from afar (that was my favorite line). That was until someone came along and decided to shoot and ruin an innocent life. The extended poem may tell a simple, depressing story but the way Weyrick wrote it is far from simple, which makes it a great piece.
     “A Day in the City” was well-written due to the format where a story was told even though most of the lines were questions. The imagery in the poem helped balance the repetition of the phrase, “Did you see her,” so it is clear to the person being asked knew who he/she exactly shot. This leads me to my point that Weyrick was able to completely fool the reader that the person she was asking questions to was actually the killer instead of a bystander. The very last line, “Do you see the blood stains,/embedded the into the pavement,/in the shape of pigtails,/of the young girl,/that you didn't see,/when you pulled that trigger?” shocked me and made me think that there was actually more meaning to “A Day in the City” than it may seem. It was a clever piece and I hope the killer was able to feel guilty after seeing that he/she destroyed an innocent soul because of a single pull on a trigger.



Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 0 comments.