Feedback on "(Him)" | Teen Ink

Feedback on "(Him)"

April 6, 2016
By Anonymous

"Alone." is the last line of Carmen Smith's poem titled "(Him)."  I'd argue that the ending makes the story as much as the beginning does, and that one is just right.  It's short and punchy and leaves the reader interesed.  Satisfied, I went to the top and began to read the entire piece.

The narrator describes her significant other throughout the poem.  It's like a film; with each line the reader gets another frame, or glimpse of this person's nature. As the man approaches her and her heart beats faster, she wakes only to realize it was just a dream.  This person isn't in bed with her.  She's, well, alone.  I really appreciated the imagery in this poem and how real the descriptions feel.



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