Death Thoughts | Teen Ink

Death Thoughts

June 6, 2016
By krysB BRONZE, San Diego, California
krysB BRONZE, San Diego, California
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Imagine this: You’re coming home from a long stressful day to see your family. Lately, you’ve been feeling like you want to give up but you try so hard to be strong still. Your life is just a big mistake, knowing that you can’t handle the stuff that is going on in your life. All the stress, anxiety, fitting in, depression, school, and etc. So much problems you can’t handle all at once. You sit against your wall, sliding down to the floor. You’re thinking and you’re thinking about everything. You’re wondering why you’re still here. You’re wondering why you’re still alive. You’re wondering why you still put up with everything and everyone. You still want to disappear into thin air and probably come back when everything seems better. Feeling so hopeless and trapped inside your body. Knowing that you can’t tell anyone because you know that it will bring so much more problems. The only situation that you could think of is killing yourself. Wanting to go to a place where it’s more peaceful, where there is no problems at all. A place where everything feels right. So, you start planning on how you’re going to kill yourself; with pills, a blade, a rope, and etc, start writing your letters to the people you love, then you just stop and start thinking about it. Would you actually kill yourself even if you don’t have so much to live for? Should you do it? How should you deal with this? This wouldn’t be an easy journey but you can fix this. I strongly believe talking it out with someone you would trust is the best way to cope with it.

 

One reason I think talking it out with someone you trust is the best way because you get to express your feelings. Having suicidal thoughts doesn’t mean you’re suicidal. It’s just a thought. A suicidal thought is also known as suicidal ideation, it’s planning how to kill yourself with details but sometimes it doesn’t actually happen in reality. Suicidal thoughts shouldn’t be enclosed to yourself. The research about suicidal thoughts states, “ NO longer able to cope with an overwhelming topic(s), a death of somebody you love, breaking up with someone, and other devastating ideas (MNT, 2004-2016).” Expressing your feelings about these stuff is hard but it helps. Suicidal thoughts doesn’t change your way of thinking but it changes your personality. Becoming more hopeless and isolated. Not knowing what do at certain points. When you don’t know what to do, you usually ask for help. Suicidal thoughts are complicated, trust me I know. Keeping in all your feelings make you feel worse and believe me I know. Research about teens having suicidal thoughts state's, “ Percentage of students, 9th - 12th grade, who reported they thought about suicide, attempted suicide, and their suicide attempts required medical attention, from 1993 - 2013 (MNT, 2004  - 2016). The people who seriously thought about suicide from 1991 was 29%, by 2009 was 13.8%, by 2013 was 17%. The people who attempted suicide from 1991 was 7.3%, by 2009 was 6.3%, by 2013 was 8%. The people who attempted suicide that needed medical attention from 1991 was 1.7%, by 2009 was 1.9%, and by 2013 was 2.7%. You’re probably thinking that it’s at a low percentage but it will always change over the years. The best way to lower these percentages is to talk it out with someone. Talking it out with someone expresses your feelings, another reason is you’ll feel connected with another person.


Another reason is that you should know someone will be there for you. In no matter what situation you’re in, someone else has also gone through it. There’s your family, they are willing to talk if they enough time. If you are not comfortable to speaking with anyone in your family then it is fine, there are other people. You can tell a friend you trust. You may not know if they have gone through the same thing as you, so you can possibly connect with each other. Your friends will and might not support your decisions. My research states, “  If you call 911, you can explain how you feel to an officer, an officer is well-trained to understand. They might have you go to a hospital and get professional help (Mental Health Daily, 2013-2016).” You can also do online forums. An online forum is where you can express your feelings anonymously through a post. Doing a online forum can get you a lot of feedback from people who might have gone through it. Last but not least call a suicide hotline, you will be talking to a well trained person. You don’t have to say your name or personal information, you just talk about how you feel. Talking to a complete stranger is better than talking to no one at all. Believe me there are many people who are willing to talk. If you think there is no one, look around you and see that there are a lot of people to talk to. Many people have suicidal thoughts that just wants someone to save them from their demons in their world. Trust me on this, I know how it feels to want someone to save me from my own demons. Talking to someone does make you feel connected, but others would say to take medications.


Other people would say that talking it out is one of the worse ways to cope with suicidal thoughts. Probably some might say taking medications would be best. How would that help though it’s just medicine. It can be one of your possible choices of committing suicide. What would happen if they overdose due to the medication? The poll I had created “ Thought of Suicide, Self Harm, and Knowing someone who does Self Harm.” 13% of students have thought about suicide. 12%  of students has or still self harms. 23% of students knows someone who does self harm. Those who have thought about suicide would probably be in the hospital right now being in a coma or dying. Letting another person die to suicide. WOW!!  Their idea seems good but my idea is more realistic. Stop and think for a moment, would you want another person to die due to medications? The research I had done states, “Percentage of Females 9th - 12th grade who thought about attempting suicide, attempted suicide, and suicide attempts that required medical attention (Child Trends,2013).” “ Thought about attempting suicide; Grade 9: 25%, Grade 10: 23%, Grade 11: 22%, Grade 12: 19%. Attempted suicide; Grade 9: 14%, Grade 10: 12%, Grade 11: 9%, Grade 12: 7%. Suicide attempts that required medical attention: Grade 9: 5%, Grade 10: 12%, Grade 11: 9%, Grade 12: 3% (Child Trends, 2013).” This shows how many females from 9th - 12th grade at least done one of these things. Being open with someone will lessen the percentages. Females just sometimes want a hero to save them. Trying to talk to someone would be best.


In conclusion, talking to someone about your feelings will help you to cope with your feelings. One way is talking it out with someone that will help you, it will make you feel a relief. Another way is talking it out will make you feel connected with someone knowing that you aren’t the only one. People have different opinions about this kind of topic, though many people have trouble with this. Release your thoughts into the light, keep fighting, and your future will be great. Just give it some time to put itself in place.


The author's comments:

This is an arguement essay about suicidal thoughts, on how you should get through suicidal thoughts.


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