Detective: Ma'am please. Stop panicking and tell me what's going on.
Jen: Well, like I told you, I woke up this morning and they were dead, but now they are alive.
Detective: Did you... kill someone?
Jen: Oh goodness no!
Detective: Then tell me what's going on ma'am please.
Jen: Well... I've been debating this all morning, and I'm ready to turn myself in. I'm doing something illegal. Like right now. You see, I have... Three husbands? But this is totally accidental, I don't know how it happened! Honestly! Well... first, there's Jeremy, I married him when I was 20. Unfortunately, he got in a car crash and "died" shortly after our honeymoon. But then this morning he came knocking at my door with his big blue eyes and started telling me how much he missed me. So naturally, I slammed the door in his face and thought to myself "that was weird." And this next part gets a little crazy. Ten minutes after this little run in with Jeremy, Johns mom called me! John's my husband too, I married him when I was 22. Now you see, John fell down the stairs just days after our weeding which I felt kind of bad about because I was the one who insisted we get a house with stairs instead of an elevator. But anyway, due to the fact that he fell down the stairs, he also fell into a coma. But his parents, who happen to be very rich, kept him on life support, they just kept paying for him! Anyway, his mom called me and said "guess what Jenny! John woke up!"... It had been four years! Well, that explains two of my husbands. And Jacob, Jacob, I am so in love with Jacob. He is so smart and so funny and so attractive and he is perfect! I married him... Well, yesterday. But he's perfect and we're so happy together! I just think he might get a little mad if he found out I have two other husbands... There's also Jason, but I'm 98% sure he's actually dead. So anyway, are you going to arrest me?
Detective: ... I am speechless.
Jen: Oh, well why?
Detective: The whole situation's just... a little odd.
Jen: But you're not going to arrest me, right?
Detective: Um... If you'll excuse me, I have to go talk to my boss... I'll be right back.
(Scene Ends)