"We’ll Be Okay."

We  walked  along the beach  at  the  end  of  the  world,  holding  hands for the last time.  The sky was a multitude of fiery colors.  Terrifying, yet beautiful. I looked at her, tears coming down my eyes.  I told her, “I love you so much”.  She looked at me smiling, gesturing for me to pick her up.  Wiping my tears she looked at me and said “Don’t cry, we’ll be okay”.  I hugged her tightly. She whispered “mommy said so”.  I looked at her in astonishment.  Our mom died three years ago the day she was born.  Yet, she talked about her as if she talked to our mom herself.  I ask her, “What else did mommy tell you Mariza?” She giggled and said “mommy told me that she loves us, and can’t wait to see us”.

She then sat down and started playing in the sand, I smiled. Even at the worlds end, she still remains to see only beauty in the chaos that surrounds her. I looked at the sun. It’s even bigger now, and as dark and red as the blood that courses through my veins. I couldn’t help but to cry thinking, “Is this really it, is it really all over?” just then, I felt Mariza take my hand. She looked at me with such an expression, which only enabled me to smile back.
Once again wiping away my tears she took my hand and said “Come on; please?” I looked at her for a moment. “Sure” I said. She walked me into the water. Surprisingly the water had looked clam, and significantly more beautiful than usual. Almost, as if it had dressed for the occasion. Mariza, wanting me to feel better had pointed towards the water saying “Look, so pretty”. I looked at her smiling and said “beautiful”.

I asked her if she was hungry. She nodded her head yes. “Come on” I said taking her hand. She smiled at me and replied “sure”. We walked to the top of a grassy cliff that over looked the beach. There, I had set up a picnic for us while she was napping. I had made us each a peanut butter jelly sandwich and brought her favorite juice boxes. As always, she took apart her sandwich and ate it one side at a time. I just sat there smiling at her. For three years this little girl has been my world. To have it all stripped from me so soon; I just wished I could have seen her grow up. Her life started only three years ago. Yet, it’s already over. The worst part is, there’s no one to blame. The sun is on its final page, nearing the last word in its book. All I can hope for it to read slower. So that I may savor the very last moments I’ll have spent with my baby sister. Mariza, my world, my princess, my everything.

  She sipped on her juice box as she played with some seashells she’d collected from the beach. “Did you have fun today?” I asked. “mm-hmm” she replied smiling. “I did too” I said smiling back. I looked at her and said “I love you”. She looked back at me giggling and said “I love you too”.  My watch read 5:57. I looked at the sun. It was as if a beautiful monster rose out of the sea, and scrapped the skys with its infinite talons.  I had picked up one of her shells and told her they were pretty. She looked at me with a straight face and ever so innocently replied, “There’re for mommy”. Fighting back the tears I said smiling, “She’ll love them”. I looked at my watch, it read 5:59. At that moment everything seemed quiet. The wind stopped blowing. The ocean water became completely still. The atmosphere itself, changed. As if the world all at once realized, this was it. As if the earth itself took that last minute to take a deep breath, and except the insuppressible result in it’s very near foreseen future. Mariza looked at me sadly.  “I’m scared”, she said balling herself into my arms. I told her to “just look into my eyes. We’ll be okay”. “Is mommy coming yet?” she asked.  Smiling, eyes filled with tears I replied, “Soon”.  She stared into my eyes, smiling; as if it was the first time she’s ever seen them. I gazed back into hers, smiling; happily knowing that they’ll be the last thing I’ll ever see.

      The clock struck 6:00…