Father and Son | Teen Ink

Father and Son

September 26, 2011
By BrightBurningCampeador PLATINUM, Portland, Oregon
BrightBurningCampeador PLATINUM, Portland, Oregon
42 articles 11 photos 333 comments

Death came from behind that night, as I walked home from the shop. They say when you’re stabbed to death you feel only a sting or a jab. Don’t believe them. I could feel the burn of my flesh parting, the blade scraping my spine, my blood spraying upon my murderer. I dropped into the muck of the street, knowing for the first time the slime I walked through every day. And then it began to fade into nothing.



When I awoke I had no senses. I could feel neither the fatal wound, nor the muck upon my dead face. But somehow I knew it was there. I tried to open spectral eyes, only to find I had none. I had no form at all. Not even a spirit shaped like a body. I was just a mind.



I rose from my corpse’s brain and shook myself free of the physical tethers. Oh, the liberty of spirit I now knew. It was wonderful! For a long while I reveled in this glory, until I remembered something. I had been murdered. I must go and thank the fellow who had done it. But who had done it?



By some lucky instinct, I went to the place where the murderer had stood. I instantly knew, in that way I have no words for, who had done it. I raced to my family’s home and found him, carefully washing the blood from his tunic and breeches.



Oh, what a modest lad, he didn’t want everybody to know his good deed! Well, the least I could do was to thank him. I went to him. It was a moment before his spirit noticed me, for his eyes couldn’t. When he did, he was so startled he let out a shriek and toppled right over. There was an odd look of guilt upon his face, guilt and horror, but I was probably mistaken. I wasn’t quite used to spirit senses yet. When I realized he was dead too I was simply delighted. So I settled down and waited for my faithful son to join me.


The author's comments:
This is a story for between the lines reading.

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This article has 4 comments.


on Feb. 13 2012 at 3:43 pm
AbigailPalmer BRONZE, London, Other
4 articles 3 photos 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
"sometimes you wake up, sometimes the fall kills you, and sometimes, when you fall, you fly"

~ Neil Gaiman

awesome story - I got quite squeamish when I was reading about how he got killed - creepy :)

experienced said...
on Nov. 1 2011 at 6:01 pm
experienced, Watertown, Wisconsin
0 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"In this great future you can forget your past" Bob Marley

wow I like it. Thats really crazy. Thats all I can say. Sounds like a jim morrison kind of writing.

on Oct. 8 2011 at 2:29 pm
BrightBurningCampeador PLATINUM, Portland, Oregon
42 articles 11 photos 333 comments
In a nutshel it's about how a guy kills his father, but the father is so happy to be dead he goes to thank the son and scares the son to death. I didn't really write it to have any specific meaning. I just felt like some irony.

on Oct. 8 2011 at 1:52 pm
TheWordSmith SILVER, Placerville, California
5 articles 0 photos 51 comments

This is definitely very interesting! Quite honestly, I was a little bit confused about the meaning behind this story (could you explain it to me? Because I really do want to understand).

Something I really liked is the flow of the story! It wasn't choppy at all - it just smoothly transitioned from one paragraph to the next.