Fang (continued) | Teen Ink

Fang (continued)

November 27, 2009
By LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.


I wanted to scream but I told myself no. If I did she would think I’m weak. And I am not weak. I didn’t want to speak. I had nothing to say. Soon she would take us away and we would get our heads chopped off. I winced. Maybe I shouldn’t think about it. I turned to face her and a pleased smile was swept across her face.
“You won’t execute us.” I mumbled.
She raised her eyebrows in amusement.
“And why is that?” she asked.
“I will rip you to shreds!” I growled.
She bared her teeth in an impatient scowl.
“Okay, you listen here little girl. You are going to die whether you like it or not.” she snapped.
Then I saw it. The simple gleam of ice white. The perfect sharp tip.
She was a vampire.
I stepped back. “This isn’t legal.” I whispered to myself, head down in thought.

“Stupid little girl.” she shook her head laughing, “I thought you would have guessed that by now. How else would a tracker be able to catch a vampire?”
I opened my mouth to speak but was stopped short by her shriek.
I looked up and saw Max cutting her throat. The silver blood began to run down her neck, turning her clothes gray. Her head plopped to the ground and Max dropped her body.
I could feel the nausea rolling in my stomach and I leaned over. Everything that I just ate came up.
When I was finished Max finally spoke.
“Sorry. I guess that was a little disgusting.” he shrugged.
“Disgusting!” I gasped, “More like horrifying!”
“Again, sorry!”
“Aren’t you still mad at me?” I asked.
He shook his head. “I guess you had to. Considering your mom was never around to teach you how to hunt…”
I nodded. That’s exactly what I was thinking earlier. The tracker did take my mom last year and she was the only other vampire in my family.
“Can you…?” I gestured toward the body, feeling sick again.
He sighed and picked up the body and severed head. “I’ll be back.” and he sprinted toward the woods.

CHAPTER 2 Lycan

Once again I puked. I was cleaning up the blood left over from the tracker.
I was wondering why this disgusted me because I kill humans but, the silver blood and the head… I just couldn’t take it. Plus, the rancid, sour smell was unbearable.
When Max got back we decided to leave. Eventually the others would think something’s wrong. We packed up and set up camp in the woods.
I slept in the nearest tree. Hanging by one foot on the lowest branch. If I fell I wouldn’t die but… I might break my neck. I drifted off into sleep and thankfully woke up the same.
“You look like a purple-faced smurf.” Max chuckled.
I rolled my eyes. “And you look like a zombie.”
He did too. His eyes had deep blue circles underneath them.
“Didn’t you sleep?” I asked.
He shook his head.
I lifted myself up to sit on the branch.
“Well then, I think it’s time we taught ourselves to hunt” I smiled proudly.
He huffed out a huge gust of air and walked underneath me. I rolled my eyes and jumped off the other side. Landing with pained ankles.
“I could’ve caught you.” he mumbled as I rubbed my sore feet.
I growled in protest, and my world suddenly went black.
When I got up I was shocked to see him holding a dead deer.
“How did you…” I started to say, “How did I…?”
“I went and got it when you passed out. It’s really not that hard with really sharp teeth.” he grinned. “And you passed out because you had too much blood in your head it all went down too fast.” he grinned again.
I shuddered at his sharp teeth. Mine weren’t that sharp anymore.
I had a singe of jealousy go through me but I shook it off.
Why should I care if his teeth were sharper than mine?
I didn’t and I never would. We pulled the deer in half with a sickening rip and at everything but the guts and bones.
Suddenly a sour smell burned my nose.
“Hey, do you smell that?” I asked him.
He sniffed the air, shook his head.
I got up, “I’ll be back.” and raced into the woods, following the sickening smell. Suddenly it was too much to bear and I puked on the spot.
The smell hit the back of my throat and stung my nose. Then I realized what it was. There were splatters of vampire blood on the trees and a Lycan or werewolf over in the corner ripping what was left of the tracker, into pieces. I heard a howl and I screech. It was Jason. I rolled my eyes as a shocked expression came across his face.
“J-Jennifer… uhh.. What’re you doing here?” He stammered.
“Trying to figure out where that stench is coming from.” I snorted.
He laughed. “Well I guess that was me. I really need a shower. My sweat has the weirdest smell.”
“Too much information.” I mumbled.
“So… what are you doing here?” he asked slowly, as if trying to change the subject.
“Are you a Lycan Jason?” I asked.
“What me? What are you talking about Jen? They’re not real.”
“Oh really? Oh so then, why is there vampire blood on your shirt?
“Okay fine. I’m a Lycan.” he twitched uncomfortably.
I swallowed the lump lodged in my throat. He could eat me. I thought nervously.
“Wait.” he growled as I started to walk away. “How the hell did you know this is vampire blood.”
“I-I…. just a lucky guess.” my voice was quivering.
He growled once more. “Are you a vampire Jen!” He whipped the question at me.
I let a tear pass and nodded my head slowly.
“Go. Now.” He said, his voice tense.
“Y-You’re not going to hurt me?” I asked.
“GO!” he snapped.
Tears stung in my eyes and I sprinted into the woods.
Jason was a Lycan. Huh. I wonder why.
He had to have been bitten by someone else we know. But who?
“Max!” I yelled.
“Yeah?” I heard it on my right and ran towards his voice.
The minute I got there I told him straightforward what happened. “Jason’s a Lycan. He’s in the woods.” I panted. Even a vampire gets tired after running six miles.
He tensed. “What?”
“I know. But he told me to leave so I don’t think he wanted to hurt me.” I said in a rush.
His shoulders relaxed a bit.
“We have to go find him.” he mumbled, packing up everything.
“Wha-What!” I yelled.
He looked right into my eyes. “We have to. We need to make sure he’s okay.”


The author's comments:
This is the continued part of fang. i'm still working on it but, this is what i have so far.

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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 21 comments.


andistar said...
on Dec. 16 2011 at 8:54 am
wow! I love this! I already read the 1st part. it was great. and I dont agree with Ariesangel. This is nothing likt Twilight. *I hate Twilight* But anyway, great story! I'm writing a novel, Its called Under My Mask. its great. We should keep in touch, ya know? But yea, great stories :))

on Dec. 1 2011 at 12:26 pm
xo19brandee93xo SILVER, Griswold, Connecticut
6 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted-One moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?"

I am really enjoying this story. I like how you have your own view of vampires and werewolves like me. im sorry that people think you copied twilight. Its nothen like twilight

on Jul. 21 2010 at 4:50 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

well thanks! :D

on Jul. 20 2010 at 4:16 pm
whateverjuliet BRONZE, Miami, Florida
3 articles 3 photos 89 comments

Favorite Quote:
true love never dies,it only gets stronger with time.

i think its super original it almost dosnt remind me of twilight at all cuz jen is already a vampire and instead of saying werewolf you say lycan (thats a very original name) i love were the story is going!!!!!!

on Apr. 28 2010 at 3:55 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

thanks soccercrazy :)

on Apr. 27 2010 at 11:04 am
CanYouSeeTheCrazy PLATINUM, Cle Elum, Washington
21 articles 0 photos 125 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I know why everyone in this world is so desperate to find love."
"Oh yeah? Why then?"
"Because, it's the closest thing we have to magic."

i think it's a very original story, and it's only just started. max and the girl aren't in a relationship other than sibling-like, and the werewolf just appeared in the story. you have no idea where it's going, so stop making assumptions about things you don't know yet, Ariesangel.

on Jan. 25 2010 at 1:15 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

I like feedback but i don't like feedback when people don't have their facts straight.

on Jan. 18 2010 at 4:22 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

yeah. that's what i thought

on Jan. 14 2010 at 9:23 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

yes. but i have about 13 friends. including me. who think you sound like an annoying fifth/sixth grader who thinks she knows everything.

Lahari GOLD said...
on Jan. 13 2010 at 7:08 pm
Lahari GOLD, Edison, New Jersey
19 articles 0 photos 71 comments

Favorite Quote:
\\\\\\\"Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That\\\\\\\'s why its called the present.\\\\\\\"
— Eleanor Roosevelt

\\\\\\\"When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch as the world wonders how you did it.\\\\\\\'

mm hmm, thats what they all say. i read many more vamp stories and they r not a copy of twilight! so get with the program k? i m not the only one who thinks this is a copy. THANX BANANA123!

on Jan. 13 2010 at 5:07 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

okay if it was possible, i would have steam coming out of my ears and my face would be beat red. okay? okay. i started writing this BEFORE I KNEW ANYTHING ABOUT TWILIGHT IF I HADN'T SAID IT ALREADY. and i am dissapointed that you, ariesangel that you said you were a twilight fan. you would be if you wouldn't have said this is EXACTLY like twilight. have you read other vampire stories? no probably not because you would go on the authors website and tell them they copied stephenie meyer. I wrote about vampires because i LIKE vampires. and these vampires aren't anything like the characters in

Twilight

House of night

or companions of the night. so GET OF MY BACK. there are other people who write about vampires. they can do that. maybe i added the werewolf because i felt like it. and you wouldn't know. she's probably never going to see him in the story ever again. but you decided to judge me at the very beginning of this. and banana123 i did NOT copy stephenie meyer and i happened to be using my imagination.

Lahari GOLD said...
on Jan. 11 2010 at 4:58 pm
Lahari GOLD, Edison, New Jersey
19 articles 0 photos 71 comments

Favorite Quote:
\\\\\\\"Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That\\\\\\\'s why its called the present.\\\\\\\"
— Eleanor Roosevelt

\\\\\\\"When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch as the world wonders how you did it.\\\\\\\'

yeh u can just keep yapping.....but theres no one here to listen to ur remarks! ur just trying to cover up ur mistake.

on Jan. 10 2010 at 5:03 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

well. if you knew anything about twilight you would know that bella isn't a vampire until the last book. there are no zombies. (sorry if i spoiled that for anyone who actually likes this story) jacob is called a WEREWOLF not a LYCAN and he can't eat vampires because it's POISON TO HIM. and the plot has nothing to do with twilight at all. so unless you've read the books you have misread my story completely. if you were a true twilight fan you would know this is nothing like it at all. read the first part of the story will you?

Lahari GOLD said...
on Jan. 10 2010 at 10:10 am
Lahari GOLD, Edison, New Jersey
19 articles 0 photos 71 comments

Favorite Quote:
\\\\\\\"Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That\\\\\\\'s why its called the present.\\\\\\\"
— Eleanor Roosevelt

\\\\\\\"When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch as the world wonders how you did it.\\\\\\\'

yeh yeh whatev. u can say whatev u want but thats not gonna change the truth.

on Jan. 9 2010 at 12:49 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

it's not anything like twilight. at all.

Lahari GOLD said...
on Jan. 9 2010 at 10:00 am
Lahari GOLD, Edison, New Jersey
19 articles 0 photos 71 comments

Favorite Quote:
\\\\\\\"Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That\\\\\\\'s why its called the present.\\\\\\\"
— Eleanor Roosevelt

\\\\\\\"When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch as the world wonders how you did it.\\\\\\\'

he told her to run away before he loses control! next time u think of a REAL story, tell me, okay? Until then, goodbye Twilight copier!

on Jan. 8 2010 at 8:59 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

um excuse me? it's nothing like twilight. and a lycan is a werewolf. and how do u know if he wont hurt her or not? you haven't read the whole story yet.

Lahari GOLD said...
on Jan. 4 2010 at 5:26 pm
Lahari GOLD, Edison, New Jersey
19 articles 0 photos 71 comments

Favorite Quote:
\\\\\\\"Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That\\\\\\\'s why its called the present.\\\\\\\"
— Eleanor Roosevelt

\\\\\\\"When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch as the world wonders how you did it.\\\\\\\'

Um, WAKE UP! SHes a vampire and hes a vampire and theres this other dude who is a Lycan(?) and he WONT hurt her UNLIKE his other bretheren becuase he CARES about her.

on Jan. 4 2010 at 5:19 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

Um... this is NOTHING like twilight. At all. the only thing that's the same is the hunting animals. Everything else is different.

Lahari GOLD said...
on Jan. 3 2010 at 6:34 pm
Lahari GOLD, Edison, New Jersey
19 articles 0 photos 71 comments

Favorite Quote:
\\\\\\\"Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That\\\\\\\'s why its called the present.\\\\\\\"
— Eleanor Roosevelt

\\\\\\\"When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch as the world wonders how you did it.\\\\\\\'

isnt this the EXACT copy of Twilight? Its a really good story but u need to come up with some original ideas.