The Confusion | Teen Ink

The Confusion

September 27, 2009
By RLJoy DIAMOND, Glen Rock, New Jersey
RLJoy DIAMOND, Glen Rock, New Jersey
56 articles 0 photos 86 comments

The sky looked as if it was a blank canvas. It seemed like someone placed white cotton balls on the canvas and took a long brush, ready to dip it in the cold, clear water. After that she seemed to choose what color to paint on the mysterious picture. Soon, out of the blue, a long brown trunk formed. It seemed as if the branches were bare but there was still one, tiny, red leaf clinging from the long, elegant branch. Slowly that last vivid leaf fell off the branch and onto the collection of leaves that were on the dead grass…

Right under that bare, tree was a wooden bench. On that wooden bench was a little girl; her brown eyes stared at the once lively park. Her blond stranded hair blew in the scornful breeze…On that deadly silent day at the park.

After a few minutes of sitting on the wooden bench the girl stood up and started scurrying onto the abandoned pathway, not knowing where it led to. She heard the dirt crinkle as her shoes touched the ground. The sun seemed to dissolve behind the trees. Everything looked as if it was a shadow as she came nearer and nearer towards a pitch black tunnel. As she resumed from the tunnel and went back to what seemed reality, she came out to seek upon the sun hovering over her. The heat waves felt as if they were strangling her. She stopped as she took big huffs of a breath… Her tiny eyes seemed to seal shut and she slowly fell onto a pile of swarming flowers…

Her eyes opened wide to see a bunch of multiple colored flowers. She could smell the dwelling flowers that seemed to waver off on her as if it was perfume. Everything seemed to be such a conundrum as she looked down at that path that disappeared in the distance.

She soon started to gallop throughout the path; then came to a halt. Right in front of her eyes was a gigantic piece of pointy lead. In fact it seemed like a pencil and holding the huge pencil was a little girl that can be identified as her twin. They both had brown eyes, blonde hair and tiny little freckles on their face. In fact that was not her twin that was the little girl herself…

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This article has 8 comments.

RLJoy DIAMOND said...
on Mar. 5 2011 at 1:09 pm
RLJoy DIAMOND, Glen Rock, New Jersey
56 articles 0 photos 86 comments
thanks for the comment :D

on Dec. 7 2009 at 2:23 am
Kayira1991 GOLD, Dhaka, Other
15 articles 181 photos 102 comments

Favorite Quote:
I have miles to go before I sleep
If there is a will, there is a way
Nothing is impossible

Its a good story. The ending is superb!!!!!!!!!!!

RLJoy DIAMOND said...
on Nov. 24 2009 at 9:57 pm
RLJoy DIAMOND, Glen Rock, New Jersey
56 articles 0 photos 86 comments
Thanks for the comment!

on Nov. 24 2009 at 12:37 pm
KiraKira PLATINUM, Cardiff By The Sea, California
35 articles 0 photos 217 comments

Favorite Quote:
Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and above all, pity those who live without love -Albus Dumbledore

Interesting. I like the end. It leaves the reader going, 'wait, what?' in a good way. :) Good job!

RLJoy DIAMOND said...
on Oct. 22 2009 at 6:15 pm
RLJoy DIAMOND, Glen Rock, New Jersey
56 articles 0 photos 86 comments
thanks. I wrote this story at midnight while doing hw so thats why its not so long and it was suppose to be that a little girl was drawing a picture of herself in a fantasy world.

on Oct. 22 2009 at 5:42 pm
LegacyPen BRONZE, Hudson, Massachusetts
4 articles 0 photos 34 comments

Favorite Quote:
(my continued bio) Infinity, or Destiny of Infinity on here, is a total of 82,860 word count. I am in the editing process.

I liked it, but am a little confused. Who was the girl? What was her name? Was it her twin, or some reflection fantasy thing?

I find it kinda cool how you seem to have a precise story length! Have you written any story longer? It's just something I found interesting :D

RLJoy DIAMOND said...
on Oct. 21 2009 at 3:17 pm
RLJoy DIAMOND, Glen Rock, New Jersey
56 articles 0 photos 86 comments
thanks for the comment

on Oct. 21 2009 at 12:31 pm
Mocahking SILVER, Wesminister, Maryland
6 articles 0 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
I've got 100 steps to go, tonight I'll make it 99- Superchick
I love music, can't imagine bein here without it, so turn it up, let yo neighbors all hear about it!- TFK
I have trouble placing my vision within the bounds of reality- ME!!!! :)

For a sec i kept on thinkin Wizard of oz... but then it turned out dorthy had a twin. who woulda thunk it? intresting story though