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A Story of a Boy and a Girl
It was definitely true love. Not the kind of love between two naÃ¯ve teenagers who experimented with each other sexually in order to propel themselves to fame within their peer groups. It was the kind of love that did without all the fake bullsh** and got to the main point: they were a boy and a girl who had chemistry from the moment their eyes met.
June 25, 2007
He came out of nowhere. What I mean is that right when I stopped looking for the man of my dreams, he found me. Well kind of. He did not look like the prince charming I had been searching for, but he sure acted like him, so polite and oh so cheerful. I always knew I had an affinity for Jewish boys, but I never realized he’d be this Jewish.
He works as the head counselor at Camp Ahava, where I am Rabbi Abramanel’s secretary. And boy, do I like a man in power! Today, he wore a tight aqua t-shirt that revealed his muscular figure. A part of me just wanted to rip off his t-shirt and pounce on him. But then I reminded myself that nice Jewish girls simply never act on sexual impulses, or even think them aloud. I realized that this handsome man whose heart I had longed for was not an oversimplified adolescent whose thoughts revolved around fake engorged breasts and video games; he was an Orthodox yeshiva boy for Christ’s sake! You know, the “no touching girls before marriage, or shomer negiah type.”
I still don’t know his name but I already feel the special bond between us. It’s not love or anything, because I don’t believe in love. All I know is that he gave off this positive vibe and all day it was like some magnet was pulling us together. Maybe it was God planning this from the heavens, or maybe it’s just all in my head. I don’t know, but for now it doesn’t really matter.
These feelings of romance were not just all in her head; in fact, he later admitted he felt it too from the moment he saw her.
June 27, 2007
Alas, I found out his name! It’s Yoel. Today we spoke for the very first time. I woke up extra early this morning so that I would have enough time to look my best. I wore my electric blue eyeliner with my new summer dress and eyeglasses, to pull of a sexy but sophisticated look. And I really think I caught his attention. I was organizing the rabbi’s office when he and one of the other counselors passed by. I noticed them looking through the window, then whispering to each other and cracking up. Later on in the day, I got up the courage to make the first move. I introduced myself, and then he got down on his knees, stared into my eyes, and told me I was beautiful. No, I’m totally kidding. He just told me it was a pleasure to meet me and he would look forward to working with me this summer. So, I am proud to say that the man of my dreams, Yoel Hessler, officially knows my name.
July 1, 2007
Wow, I have so much to tell you! So yesterday he touched me for the very first time! He was ahead of me in line waiting to buy lunch when he brushed my shoulder with his large masculine hands and asked me if I wanted anything. What a gentleman! So today, after ranting on to my best friend Leslie about how cute he was, she finally decided to come along and judge for herself. And she was in complete agreement with me (and a bit jealous I believe). We decided to make this a competition, just to make our lives a bit more interesting, only that we’re not both competing for Yoel. I get a point every time Yoel gives me attention, and Leslie will get a point every time his friend Raphael notices her. So far, I am winning! A brush on the shoulder is great progress, considering that these boys are forbidden from even shaking hands with women before marriage. This is going to be one interesting summer…
July 3, 2007 (10:40 p.m.)
I am sorry to say, I am bathing your pages in my tears. Leslie tries to comfort me, but she doesn’t understand. And I just can’t tell mom because I already know how she feels about religious boys. She claims they are perverts who appear friendly on the outside, but on the inside are just trouble. Well, she’s right. I cannot believe I had even fallen for him. As much as I try to forget the scene, I keep replaying it vividly in my mind. I was standing outside of the pizzeria when I saw Yoel with another girl. I walked over to him to say hello, and he immediately ran away, screaming not here. He is such an a**hole, making me think he actually cared about me when in reality, he was embarrassed to even say hello to me in public. And who was that girl? His secret girlfriend? Whatever, he’s a jerk and I’m so over him.
July 4, 2007 (1:24 a.m.)
Okay, it turns out I’m not over him. He just did the cutest thing…he called me and apologized! He explained that he was with his matchmaker and he had just finished explaining to her that he did not ever talk to girls and then two minutes later, there I popped up, all excited to see him. So it turns out he wasn’t embarrassed of me after all; he just couldn’t ruin his reputation and his chances of getting married to a nice Jewish woman. Still, though, he could have been nicer about it. But I told him that and he seems pretty sensitive. Anyway, I like him and after that phone call, I am pretty sure he likes me too.
But just keep in mind: their relationship wasn’t that simple. It was forbidden: forbidden by her overly compulsive parents who insisted that Orthodox boys were trouble and forbidden by his uncompromising religion that prohibited him from even laying a finger on a girl before marriage. But that didn’t stop them from seeing each other. In fact, that made their love all the more excitingâ€”they were hiding from her parents and his god.
July 7, 2007
Yoel texted me this morning and said good morning with a smiley face! How cute is that?
July 14, 2007
Tonight was awesome! Leslie and I double dated with Raphael and Yoel. We went to the Santa Monica Pier, where we stared into the night sky and took pictures running barefoot on the beach. We also went on the Ferris wheel, and considering I am afraid of heights, I felt like I was going to faint. Of course, Yoel didn’t know that so he played a little joke and pretended to open the door in midair, but after noticing the fear on my face, he realized that this was no joking matter. He took my hand in his and I felt the warmth of his skin against my own. It was such a magical feelingâ€”I felt like I was back in fourth grade because the contact of our hands seemed like the biggest deal. I guess that’s just what happens when your body yearns for someone’s touch for so long, and finally gets it weeks later. I couldn’t have asked for a more perfect nightâ€”even a kiss on the cheek would be going too far. Our relationship is perfect the way it is.
July 19, 2007
My mom is trippin’ balls. I am on house arrest. I have lost my phone and Internet privileges. Mom somehow found the pictures from the beach, though I don’t know how because they were on Leslie’s camera and I’m pretty sure she hasn’t uploaded them on Facebook yet. Anyway, the point is I’m busted.
“Busted for just liking a boy?” I ask in disbelief.
“No, Sandra” my mother answered. “Busted for liking a religious boyâ€”and acting upon it too.”
“But I didn’t even kiss him!”
“Kiss him?!? You deliberately went against my simple orders to not hang out with religious boys, and you went against the policy of the camp by corrupting their counselors, and you wanted to kiss him too?” she asked in disbelief. “Wait till we see what Rabbi Abramanel will say when he hears about his counselors roaming the streets on the weekends with two unreligious girls.”
I feel invaded, my privacy stripped from my hands. I sit here on my bed immersed in my own sorrow as I pour my heart out to you. No more seeing Yoelâ€”although I doubt he will even look at me after the sort of trouble my mother will be getting him into. No more good morning text messages, no more smiles to greet me during the day, no more love songs in the shower. I have definitely lost my mom’s trust, but this summer was worth it and I don’t regret a single minute spent with Yoel. My mom just does not understand; he is actually one of the most considerate guys I have ever met.
But you know what they say: Always trust a mother’s instinct.
July 24, 2007
It’s only been five days and Yoel has already moved on. I guess my mom was rightâ€”religious boys are dirty. Leslie has been taking my place at camp and she found out all the gossip. First of all, Yoel got a reduction on his salary until he proves to Rabbi Abramanel that he will improve his behavior. But more importantly, Yoel supposedly hooked up with some dumb redhead at a party the other night. A part of me feels jealous of the girl, but at the same time, I am happy that I didn’t let him use me like that. My month of love was definitely more memorable than her night of lust. I don’t care who this girl is or whateverâ€”I know that I enjoyed the time I had with him and there is nothing I would do to take it back.
July 25, 2007
I wonder if the this redhead knew anything about him: that he is religious, he plays the guitar, he has eight siblings, he aspires to become a brain surgeon…As much as I try to tell myself that I don’t care that he hooked up with this girl and that he had no obligation to me, I can’t deny the fact that I am truly hurt. The man that I have dreamt of for so long has forgotten me within a matter of a week.
July 30, 2007
I am heartbroken. Period. End of story.
Well, this was the end of the story as Sandra knew it, but not the end of the whole story... You see, the dumb redhead was someone she had known personally, and had confided in. Did I ever tell you I had red hair? And for that matter, that my name is Leslie? Anyway, it’s insignificant to the storyline. Now that the business has been taken care of and Sandra is confined to her home, it’s time for me to have a little fun of my own.