It was a dark gloomy evening here in Lafayette Colorado. I was sitting on my bed alone in my room watching cartoons. My dad is my living room “getting lit” also known as smoking crack. I’m only 13 I shouldn’t be seeing things like this, by the time I was 8 I knew what every single drug looked like and the affects it has on you. My moms name is Kayla she left my family and moved to Denver when I was about 3 years old. I hated her so much. She put my dad through a lot of struggles by just leaving our family and now she’s wanting back in.
My mom came over the other day and claimed that she is done doing drugs. She said “I’ve changed for the better sweetie, I want you to live with me.” NO I thought right away. I wasn’t going to live with someone who left me alone with a crack head at such a young age. My dad thought it was the best idea. He doesn’t want me around either. They both decided that it would be a good idea for me and that I would be moving to Denver October 1st 2016.
It is now October 1st 2016. I hate my life. Today is the day I have to move in with my god-awful mom. The car ride from lafayette to Denver was long and awkward. It was only an hour drive but it felt as if it was 20 hours of being tortured. We finally show up to a tiny little apartment in downtown. “Great” I mumbled under my breath. We’re going to be living right next to each other with no room to myself. We get all my stuff moved in and I go straight to my room, not saying one word to my mom. My mom walks into my room and says “you're welcome.” I put my headphones in and turn the other way. She rips out, and starts crying. While she’s crying she mumbles that she loves and that she is really sorry for leaving me. I take the headphone and put it back in my ear. She runs out of my room crying.
  I continued to sit there for about 30 more minutes but I was feeling guilty. I went to go find her. I couldn’t find her anywhere. I looked all over that tiny little house for her and she was gone. My mom obviously didn’t care so why should I? It was about 8 o’clock and I was waiting for my mom to come home and make dinner. I made myself some mac and cheese and realized that things were not going to change around here.
My mom finally got home around 10 o’clock. She looked wasted. I pretend to be sleeping when she comes in and checks on me. After about 30 minutes I sneak over to look what she’s doing in her room. I walk closer and heard some sniffles. Thinking it was her crying I walk in. It was her doing coke. I scream at her “What are you doing?” she didn’t respond. She just looked at me blankly as if she wanted to say something but didn’t have the nerve. I ran to my room packed my bag and left. I wasn’t going to live in this situation anymore. I am on my own now.
It was the first night. I had no idea where I was, I was used to a small town, where I wouldn’t feel unsafe walking around at night time. I started walking down and made it to the 29th street mall. I was scared. I called my mom and started balling my eye out. I apologized and said things needed to change before I came back> She was crying to saying she was worried sick about me. My mom finally comes to pick me up and doesn’t say a word. As soon as we get back she says “it’s been a long day, I’ll talk to you in the morning.”
It was the next morning. I wake up and walk straight to my mom's room to talk. I start crying on the walk over there. She was awake and crying too. “Sorry” she said as soon as she saw me. “I never meant to hurt you”. I reply with “It’s okay”. We lay in her bed and talk for a couple hours. I realize that she’s actually a really cool person. After we get done talking about our crazy night, I say “I love you and just want all of this to stop.” She says “It will sweety.”