I knew it was a bad idea, but I was already in too deep. She told us not to go to that party, but the food smelled so good and the music sounded so nice. We neglected her warning and followed our senses into the dimly lit house. It was a good thing that Sky was there with me, because things got pretty bad pretty quickly. I sat down in the living room with Sky and a plate of delicious melted cheese nachos/ I was absorbed in every bite and I didn’t realize what was happening around me. The smell of cheesy heaven began to melt away as the smell of beer, sweat and stupidity emerged. This caught my attention and I glanced up to see that within an hour, the amount of people in the house multiplied, as did the amount of fear in my body.

Brimming with fear and confusion, I said, “Sky, I want to leave can we-“ As I turned my head to where Sky was sitting, my heart sank.


He was no longer there. I hollered his name, but my voice drowned in the music. “Sky! Sky? Where are you? Sky? Please Sky! Sky?” I took out my phone and dialed his number. I wiped my fallen tears from the screen and raised the phone to my ear. No answer. I tried at least twenty times and each time was the same message. I replayed it in my head. We’re sorry, the number you are trying to reach is not available at this time, please check the number or try again later. Try again later. The thing is, I needed Sky now, not later.

I tried my best to stand but my heart pounded me right back to the couch. It was obvious that the strangers thought I was one of them. But I was not one of them. They were all struggling to stand because they were intoxicated with alcohol, but I was struggling to stand because I was intoxicated with fear and guilt, but mostly fear.

I was finally able to get to my feet. Slowly, I began to walk. I took every step cautiously. I had never been around these many drunk people before. I tried to keep my eyes on the direction that I was walking, but there was too much happening around me not to notice. I saw eyes piercing through me, nobody knew who I was, nor did I know who they were. I was scared.

I looked out the window of the living room to see a distant figure, I think its Sky. I ran out of the house and towards him. As I got closer, I could see the brightness of his teeth. Smiling? I slowed to a stop. How could he be smiling right now. Is it of no concern that the girl he came here with and claims to love so much is nowhere to be found? I dialed his number and watched from a distance as he ignored the call. I stood there and watched as he placed his hand in the girls hand in front of him and bit his lip. Shoot me. Now. I feel like throwing up.

I want to so badly approach him and tell him how deeply I’m hurting, but I cant seem to find the strength. I don’t want to lose him, my heart begged that he stop, but as I watched, he continued.

I loved him. I love him. I turned in the other direction and ran fast. The cold of the wind bit at me. I replayed the fear and hurt over and over in my head and didn’t stop running. Was this all a joke to him? Who is that girl? I thought I was his girl?

I finally collapse to the hard cement ground and let out tears that felt like fire as they fell.