Family Isn’t Just Blood
Parents. Everyone has them at one point in their lives, even if it’s for a few minutes that you can’t even remember, those few minutes as a newborn baby being held in your mother’s arms. In those few minutes you think you’ll be in her arms forever, until she let’s go of you while you’re crying your eyes out, silently begging her not to leave you. Unfortunately though, she doesn’t really care about your crying. For her, it’ll be over in a few minutes anyways.

I’ve moved from foster home to foster home my entire life, and I know what you’re thinking: foster child, she’s probably just a problem child. Well, I’ve got news for you people, I’m not! In fact I am a pretty good kid. Good grades (4.5 GPA!), hard-worker, trustworthy, and lots of good qualities that any parent would want. So why haven’t I got adopted, or even put into a decent foster home?! I’ll probably never know. Anyways the story I’m about to tell you today all started with a belt.

“Stop, please, STOP!” I yelled, screaming in pain. My foster father, Mr. Denny, was angry. Very angry. It was happening all over again. Him getting angrier than ever. Him coming towards me with his eyes narrowed. Him pulling out his belt, and then everything happen in a blur. The only thing that I can’t erase from that day is the pain. The searing pain; the sound of the whip lashing me everywhere. My back, my legs, everything just ached and hurt so much, and that wasn’t the worst part. I can’t ever forget the way he constantly kicked, especially in the stomach. I puked right after which just got him madder. It cost me a shove into the wall and a slapping.
All of this abusing obviously caused noise, and my neighbors thankfully had a bit of sense to realize that something was wrong. When the police slammed down the door my foster father did something no parent had ever done to me. He pulled me towards him and put me in a headlock and put a gun to my head. In that moment I thought I was going to die! No, I didn’t even think, I knew.
A wasted life, I thought. No meaning, no purpose, nothing. Nothing at all. Just life of abuse, emotional and physical. A life of where all I did was try to prove myself to everybody. And what exactly? That I was a normal human being. That I had feelings and that they were as real as anybodies! This was the end. It was finally the end. I didn’t have to suffer anymore. I could finally be at peace.
“Put down the gun! Put it down!” Mr. Denny held me tighter and the officers obeyed him and put down their guns. Then, he slowly walked backwards, still holding me. When he got to the door he pushed me forward and ran out. The cops picked up their guns and ran after him. A few stayed back to take me to the hospital. No long term stuff or anything. Then, like always, I had to go to the police station and make a statement. By this time Mrs. Denny had found out about all of this. Poor woman was in so much shock. She couldn’t believe that her husband was an abuser. She was in hysterics. Later that night she didn’t say anything to me. And for the next few days, she looked like all the life had been sucked out of her. Eventually I was kicked out and moved to a new foster house, again.

Truly though, it didn’t bother me. Not anymore. Nothing ever did. For a split second I thought I was going to die, and for another split second I actually wanted to, and maybe I still did. Maybe, just maybe, I wanted to stop being treated like I was toy that hurt and fix up again without scars being left over. I was tired of it. Thankfully the world wasn’t as cruel as I thought it was.


“Hi, Layla. I’m so sorry. For once I thought I put you in the right spot. I never thought Mr. Denny would do this to you” Teddy pulled me into an instant bear hug. Teddy worked for child services; he’s the one who always put me in my crappy foster homes. At first I absolutely hated him because I thought he purposely put me into the worst foster homes, but I found out he wasn’t such a bad guy. People just seemed to be very good at manipulating him very easily. Teddy was one of my only friend’s, other than Mary-Kate, my best friend from the inner city of Dallas. We were once in a foster home together, and she was like me. Smart, but misjudged because of her situation. People always thought we were rebels looking for attention. She was my only friend at school, because everyone at school was scared of us. We got separated a year ago, but we still text all the time. She was the lucky one. Her foster family ended up adopting her. She says they’re really kind to her, and that she’s finally happy. I’m glad everything worked out for her, but I kind of wondered why she got adopted, and not me. Teddy interrupted my deep thoughts and said, “You ok, Layla?”


“Huh? Um…yeah. I’m fine. I’m ok. It’s not something new, right? I’m used to it. So…who’s my new family?”


“Layla, I am truly sorry for everything you’ve been through. Really, I am. So from now on, you don’t have to suffer anymore. I just got a raise yesterday. I have enough space for one more person, and my wife and I have always wanted a child, so—“before Teddy could say more, I jumped up and hugged him.

“Thank you so much. Thank you, thank you!!” I sobbed onto his shoulder and stayed there for who knows how long. I’d finally got my happy ending. I finally found my family.
Ok homework, check. Studying check. Practice for squash, check. Perfected my performance, check. Or at least I think so…I mean the piano isn’t always the easiest of instruments to play. Now I get to go relax and read a great book. These are some of the privileges I’ve been getting for the past two years of my life. Peace, Serenity. My life changed so much since Teddy and his wife Amelia adopted me. Now I live in sunny California with Teddy and Amelia. I love them with all my heart and I’m more than grateful to them. Without them I think I would’ve committed suicide, and I would’ve never been able to make the friends I have today or do the things I love. As I read my book, I hear the garage opening. It must Amelia-her shift ends early today. “Amelia, is that you?”
“Yes honey, it is. How was your day?”
“It was good. What about you?” I walked down the stairs to see Amelia’s eyes all red and swollen. I could guess she was crying, but why? “Amelia, what happened?!”

“Layla, I can’t even begin to say how sorry I am. I tried to tell to you; I really did. I-I just didn’t know how to! I—“

“Wait! What are you talking about? Amelia, whatever it is, you can tell me; you know that. We’ll get through this together, whatever it is” She started crying even harder. I was so confused. What was so “terrible” that my mom couldn’t even tell me? I went up to her and gave her hug and told her everything was ok. I waited until Teddy came home from his shift at the hospital, “Teddy, do you what’s wrong with Amelia? The minute she came home she started crying! She said something about not telling me—“And before I could say anymore Teddy rushed to Amelia and yelled, “Why on God’s earth would you say anything, Amelia, especially without consulting me first!”

“She has the right to know, and she has for a long time now! I’m sorry; I know this isn’t what you want, but it’s for the better”

“WHAT IS GOING ON?!?! You guys have never fought like this before, and now is not the time to start! Whatever it is, you can tell me, and you SHOULD be telling me, since the situation at hand involves me!” I looked at the both hard, waiting for them spill whatever they’ve been hiding. It had to be serious, because I’ve never seen Teddy shout at Amelia like that. Teddy walked over to me and said the four words that basically scream bad news, “Layla, we need to talk”
*********

“So you knew about them the whole time…and you never told me” I looked up at my adopted parents with tears in their eyes and shame on their faces. They knew where my biological parents were an entire year, and they never told me. “Why?” I said as my voice quivered, “Why would not let me meet my parents? My biological family! Do I gave siblings, or anyone else that you’ve lied to me about?”

“Honey, we’re so sorry. We never wanted to keep this from you. You-you were even going to meet them last summer, but…”

“But what, Amelia? What in your right mind stopped you from letting me introduce myself to my family?!” I yelled. Amelia looked away in sadness. I know was a bit harsh on her, but all I’ve ever wanted was to see my real mother and father, and ask them why they gave me so that I could get rid of the empty hole that’s been in my heart all my life. But now that was impossible because my so-called family. Teddy took my hand and said, “What stopped us was the fact that your mother was an alcoholic and that your father is a drug dealer. We were going to let you see them, but your mother’s still in rehab and father’s still doing his time”

“Then why are you telling me about this now? Why not wait until they were better?”

“Because…because your mother just died from an overdose. She relapsed. I’m so sorry, Layla. I know you wanted meet your mom, and—“

“Just forget it, okay! It doesn’t matter; I didn’t even know her, and she left me! She left to complete strangers and then basically killed herself! So, what does it matter?! I’m fine. This information hasn’t changed anything, and you guys did the right thing. Thank you, for protecting me and for telling me the truth. Unfortunately this isn’t the truth I wanted” I walked away with moist eyes and a broken heart, but my parents didn’t deserve my tears. They really didn’t; so why was I giving it to them? I didn’t know what was worse: my mother dying or my father still in jail? Did I want to actually want to meet him? Maybe he changed, or maybe he didn’t. I wanted to know and at the same time I didn’t.

The last quarter of school went by slowly. Amelia and Teddy tried to get me to talk about my feelings and whatnot, but honestly I just wanted to forget that ever happened. Eventually they gave up. Thought that I really didn’t care. I even fooled myself that I didn’t really care, but the let’s face the music: I’ve been broken since that day. Some days I didn’t even remember it happening and other days it was all I could think about. My mother had died before I even got a chance to meet her; did I want the same thing with my father? On the last day of school I decided my answer: no. No, I didn’t want the same thing to happen to me all over again, and who knows, maybe he’s a better man. But I had to find out for myself. I told Teddy that I was off to a party and instead drove to the Colin County jail where my father had recently been transferred. I walked up to the front desk with an officer doing his paperwork. “Uh, excuse me officer…”, I looked down at his badge for his name, “Jacob. Officer Jacob?” He looked up at me and said, “Yes, may I help you?”

“Uh, yeah actually, you can. I’m here to visit my father: Ben Donovan. Is he here?”

“Just give me a moment. He’ll be right with you” He walked into another door as some other cop led me to the visiting place. “Ok remember, no physical contact, and if he tries to harm you in any way, we’ll be right here. Don’t be hesitant to call for help!”

“I won’t be. Thank you officer.” She disappeared onto the other side as my father walked in. He looked so tired and weak. I couldn’t believe this man was a drug dealer. “Hi. My name is Layla. We’ve never met before, but I’m your daughter. I just found out about you and my mom. I’m sorry for your loss” He looked at me intently and said,”Well I’m not sorry! She may’ve been, but I’m not! The minute she had you my life was ruined!”

“But--”

“Look, we may’ve been married, but I never wanted a baby. I didn’t have the time to clean up spit and buy toys all the time. I had a business to run, or at least I used to. I know this is what you wanted to hear, but, please don’t come visiting again! I want to enjoy my last few years in peace.”

“I’m sorry, Ben”, I said as my voice quivered, “I won’t bother you again. I promise, but please tell me one thing: did my mother love me?”
Ben chuckled and said, “Yeah. Yeah she did. A lot; it’s why she gave you up. She knew she couldn’t take care of you, and wanted a better a life for you” I smiled and walked away. Later that night, I told my parents about the whole thing. My real parents: Teddy and Amelia. They’re the ones who took care of me and loved me, even if it was only for two years. It was too bad that it took me this long to realize family isn’t just blood.