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New Beginnings
New year, new school, and new people. Hopefully in my new school the new people will be more like me. The kids will understand where I am coming from, and be more accepting of girls like me. Because, sadly, people in my old school only liked people who wore name brand everything and had come from a lot of money. I can still remember my dad say this to me when I was little “Maisy, don’t worry about what people say about you when you get older. Only worry about what makes you happy.” I wish my father would still say those types of things to me. But now, it’s my fault that no one likes me because I don’t put effort into changing myself. Hearing those types of things come from my dad was truly heart breaking for two reasons. One, I was his daughter, his only daughter at that, and knowing I was such an embarrassment for the family even though all I wanted to do was be myself. I never knew what I did to make my dad feel this way about me. Two, seeing my moms face when he said that I was a disappointment made everything ten times worse. I could see the hurt in my moms eyes when my dad said these things to me. But, I don’t think she will ever stick up for me and jeopardize her marriage.
When I get ready to go to bed, I wash my face, change (always into a sweatshirt and sweatpants) no matter how hot it is. Then, go to bed and wait for my mother to come in and say good night. Usually, when she does come in she says something like “You’ll always be my pride and joy, Maisy. I love you to the moon and back. And just know your dad loves you, and just doesn’t know how to show it. Good night pooh bear,” kisses my forehead, shuts off the light, and closes my door. That is what keeps me going everyday. Everytime I hear her say it, it’s like the first time. I knew tomorrow morning when my alarm went off at six in the morning, I would be getting up and getting ready to go to my new school. I was so anxious, and hoped that I would fit in better. And maybe, find a best friend that is exactly like me.
Beep! Beep! I jumped out of bed and started to get ready. Put my favorite light jeans on, with my favorite shirt that is black and white checkered with my black boots. As I was drinking tea, like I do every morning, I was staring at my dad waiting for him to say something to me. “Good luck”, “Have fun!”, literally anything. But, like I could of guessed he didn’t say anything. Just looked me up and down, and walked away. I shouldn’t have expected anything different. As I walked out the door, my mom told me to be careful and that the stairs were slippery, but that slipped my mind as I was remembering all the bad memories of my old school. How cruel they were to me, and how I hoped that the kids in my new school would be a lot different. While my mom and I were driving in her car, she asked me if I was excited, and all the normal questions a mother would ask their daughter. I kind of just let it go through one ear and out the other because I didn’t want her to only care when my dad wasn’t around. I wanted her to care all the time, with my dad being here to hear it or not. All these different ideas were spinning in my mind of why my dad wasn’t proud of me, or when he tells me that it’s my fault I don’t fit in.
My mom and I pulled up to my new school, the sign had leaves growing over the name so you could barely see it. Riverview High School. Population 230. As I got out of the car, I looked around seeing if there was anyone that dressed like me. But, there was no one around. No one was outside, and no one was in the halls. I looked into the classrooms that I passed and I saw kids sitting in their seats, doing their work. In one class they were sitting up straight listening to the teacher. No one was being disrespectful. In the next class, everyone was doing their work, perfectly. No one was talking, or fooling around. They were all doing their work. I was starting to think I would actually like this school. No one disrespectful, from what it looked like. I got to my first classroom, room 307, Ms. Gold. She was tall, with brown eyes, and brown hair. She was very welcoming, along with all six other kids in my class. One girl even complimented my outfit, and I wasn’t sure if she was being nice or, rude like everyone from my old school. But, I was hoping for the best. I sat next to her, she smiled and politely said ‘Hey, I’m Drew. Are you new here?” It took me a few seconds to actually comprehend that a girl, was actually being nice to me AND talked to me first. I waited to respond, and then with the biggest smile on my face I said “Yes, I’m Maisy.” After that, she walked me to all my classes, introduced me to all her friends who were just as friendly as her. Let’s see, there had to been at least 20 of them and they all seemed to like me. I really couldn’t believe it. Maybe I thought, maybe my dad will start to except me now, now that he sees that people do like me for me. I sat with Drew’s friends at lunch. From what I could tell we were all so similar. We talked about, our favorite movies, books, actress’, sport, and pretty much everything and anything under the sun. At two o’clock the bell rang and it was time to go home. Drew and one of Drew’s friend, Dylan gave me their numbers. When I started to walk to the car, I was so excited to tell my mom what happened on my first day of school, and forget about what happened this morning. So, I got in with something I haven’t done in a while, a smile. Until, I realized it was my dad. I could tell that he could tell I wanted to tell him something. I just needed to tell somebody. But, I knew my dad wasn’t going to ask. When we got home, I ran to the house, threw my bag on the ground, and looked all over until I found my mom. I said “Guess what happened to me at school today?!” so joyfully. And she looked at me and said “Bad day?” like she expected nothing different. For once though I could prove her wrong and tell her how perfect everything went. I told her every little detail that happened and she seemed to be so happy for me. But I knew that a whole good day for me was too good to be true. After I finished talking to my mom, my dad came around the corner and said “You can’t actually believe that one person likes you, let alone twenty of them.” I didn’t expect anything different, well I shouldn’t of but, I did. For once in my life I thought my dad would finally accept me for who I am and be proud of me. Who was I kidding? Days, and days went by and I became closer and closer with Drew and Dylan’s friends. They even came to my house. I warned them about my insensitive father, and if he said anything to ignore him. One thing was weird was when I had friends over my dad never came out of his room.
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