5/23/13

Dear Diary,

I was the smartest, I was the best, I was good at everything. I had it all. The one thing that I actually wanted for myself was happiness. You could look at my life and think that everything is perfect. You may think I have everything down. What everyone doesn't see is the stuff that is behind closed doors. The stuff that is the most important.











-Carley

5/24/13

Dear Diary,

Ever since I was a little kid, I have been pressured into doing everything that my parents wanted me to do. I never really had a say in my life now that I look back. I was put into ballet, tap, was given singing lessons, and acting lessons. My parents still expected me to to straight A’s all the time, and do as many extra activities as I could. She says apparently they look good on college applications. I was only allowed to eat certain foods, no sweets. If I did any little thing wrong, I was looked down upon and they would never forget it. This all happened up until 8th grade. Now the year is ending and I'm done letting my parents completely control my life.













-Carley

5/25/13

Dear diary,

Today is the day. The day that I tell my parents how I feel, how I want to take charge of my life and live it like a normal kid. I was walking into the family room to see my parents already sitting there reading. Okay, its time, I kept thinking. I was moving closer to them but as slow as I could go. I was so nervous my hands were shaking, legs trembling as I was walking until I was finally in front of them. “Uh mother, father”, I began to speak. “Yes”, my parents both said in unison. “Okay i'm just going to come out and say this, I started, I want to be able to take control of my life. I want to start doing things not just for you so that you're happy, for me so that I’m not the sad one in this situation even though I’m the one that has to do it. I don't want you to judge me all the time when I do something simple, I said as I looked right at my dad since he’s the main one who does it, I don't want you to force me into doing certain activities that I don't want to join, I said this one looking at my mom since she is the one who does this most of the time.” After I was finished my parents just looked at me and my father said “we will let me know tomorrow.” I walked away with my head down in shame thinking that my attempt to be my own person was a fail.





-Carley

5/26/13

Dear Diary,

Okay, so my parents called a family meeting and I’m even more nervous than before. I feel like if they say no then this one will never go unpunished and they will always look down on me for years to come. I sat there and waited for my parents to come in and sit down. In my guess they are probably making some last minute decisions because even if they say yes there always has to be a catch. They walked in finally. My anxiety went from a 60 to 1,000. They came in and stared at me. At this moment I wasn't scared anymore I was just a little bit creeped out at the fact that they are staring into my soul. Finally my mother question, “you know that we do these things you might see and controlling because we love you and want you to thrive in life right?”, I simply answered back yes. My father speaks and says, since me and your mother both trust you, we think that we should allow you a little more freedom than what we give since you will be entering high school next year. Okay what's the catch? I asked. He began to speak, your curfew will be 8 o'clock every night, and I will expect that your grades will not go down even by a little. Yes father thank you guys I said as I hugged them both and walked out of the room.
Finally I can be my own person. Finally I can be happy!





-Carley