The Loudest Clamor | Teen Ink

The Loudest Clamor

December 25, 2009
By skittless2440 BRONZE, Pittsfield, Massachusetts
skittless2440 BRONZE, Pittsfield, Massachusetts
2 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be the change you want to see in the world."


She looked out of the window and realized how identical looked just one year ago. She realized how much her life had changed in such a short period of time. She knew this day would come, this dreaded day had to happen it was no longer a dread but a harsh reality.















My name is Gabriel most call me Gabby. 365 Days ago was the day that not only transformed my life but changed the lives of my small suburban town would change. And two of its young residents lives would be more than changed but ended.

Well I guess I should start out by informing you were this all took place, Stockfield Maine. All of the towns teens attend Stockfield High. A close knit school, there were no cliques, no typical mean girls, for all intensive purposes that school was perfect. There was maybe two or three fights a year, it is still high school. We were a family, the Maple leaves. We were a strong unit, we thought nothing could touch us. Oh, how wrong we were.



Chapter 1
I woke up like it was any other day . I had no premonitions, no sixth sense, nothing.



“Buzz Buzz” It was the sound of my 2nd alarm that goes of when I don’t wake up from the 1st one. “damn” I thought to myself, “one more late and I’m in detention for a whole week.” I jolted out of bed completed the morning routine, 15 minutes, a new record and I was oh so ready to get this day over with. Tonight was me and Alex’s 2 year anniversary and I couldn’t contain my excitement.

“Ma, can I take the car or do you need to drive me?” I screamed down the hall with one shoe half on and the other securely on my foot.

“Ah, take it I guess just have it back by 2:30, we both got hot dates tonight, just kidding, but hun, I really need it back by 2:30, I’ve got a shift at the hospital until 11:00 , and make sure you’re back with Alex, around 11:30 or 12:00 okay?” My mom screamed from her bedroom.

“Alright, are you sure that you just don’t want to drive me” I exclaimed, my mother was a much faster driver and I might be able to make it on time if she took me.

“No, It’s Diane Sawyer’s last day on Good Morning America.”

“Alright” I sighed and walked down the stairs grabbed the keys from the hook and little did I know that this was one of the last moments of normalicy I would experience in a long period of time.

I got in my car and drove away. I drove down the bumpy block it took me to get to my then serene school. I walked in those doors not knowing what was behind them. Not knowing that once I opened those doors, I would never be the same.

I walked in disappointed, the halls were silent and empty. I looked down at my watch and realized I was 15 minutes late “detention for a week, oh lucky me” I thought to my self. I headed to the front office to get a late slip and a weeks worth of detention slips. I entered and heard silence, I saw no one, I was dumbfounded. I had never seen the office empty like this, something just wasn’t right.


“BANG” and then I heard it then it all made sense. That commotion , the loudest clamor I’d ever heard , It was a gun shot. I ducked under the desk as I heard the heart wretching sound . It felt like a life time was lived in those 120 seconds.


The author's comments:
The very beginnings of a possible novel,I know the tense is a little out of place but this is just the 1'st draft, I have more written it is just not typed yet, so if your interested in what happens next stay tuned!!! Comments are appreciated and thanks for reading!

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on Mar. 20 2011 at 7:31 pm
happyboat SILVER, Tacoma, Washington
6 articles 9 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Risks, I like to say, always pay off. You learn what to do, and what not to do." -Jonas Salk

Great style of writing! I often get sidetracked while reading,but this passage kept me on the edge of my seat the whole time. Brava!