The truth is, you don’t know how it feels to be alone, or maybe you do. Your family changes on you all at once. People you idolized and wanted to be like when you grew up tell you they don’t want you anymore. Your sister you used to take baths with and get mad because she splashed water in your face, suddenly doesn't want to hangout with you. You beg her to stay, but she walks away. Your brother ignores you and you’re left alone with the tears that feel up your eyes. Everynight it’s like you’ve cried an ocean. All you want is to talk to somebody, anybody, but nobody is there. You don’t know what it’s like to feel alone. For the people you once called Mom and Dad to try and find anyway to try and get rid of you. For you to be sent to an insane asylum, just so they can spend a day without you. I didn’t choose to be unwanted, it just kinda happened. 

I hide to avoid all the states and hatred that lays upon me. So alone that you start to doubt your existence. You begin to do things you normally wouldn't do whether that be doing homework or just staring at the wall because you are afraid to leave your dark and unfamiliar room. Suddenly nothing feels like yours anymore, you used to say, “ My room” now becomes, “The room“. I slip on clothes that I used to wear all the time, becomes cloths that are sad, dark, and heavy I don't want to put them on. On the way to school you feel the tension in the car . You can feel them forcing themselves not to face your direction and look a different way. Yet I try to start a conversation by asking, “How was your day?“ with a very low voice. They are hesitant to respond seems like they are contemplating whether or not to respond and when they made their mind up their response is sudden to try and end the conversation. The tone in their voice is the kind of tone that seems forced and rude. A Tone they would use if they dreaded responding. That's it, it would be like I said nothing at all.

 It’s sad when it gets to the point where you have to force yourself to leave the room something we took for granted like brushing your teeth or using the bathroom. I don't leave my room to eat, because I feel unwanted and when I do, I walk with my head low, that way I don't have to see the nasty or rude looks they give me when I leave the room and when I get back I sit at the edge of my bed and reminisce that seems to be the only thing to make me happy nowadays, to think about how things used to be. Time passes and it’s time to go to sleep. * BEEP! *BEEP! My alarm goes off I dismiss it and Begin to live the same day over again. What people don't understand is the people that smile the brightest during the day, cry the most at night.