Breathing is difficult nowadays; because we’re afraid, because we’re sick, because we’re anxious. With every second that passes, with every breath we take, we all fear that we’re one moment closer to being taken away.
And tonight is the night.
It’s the night I’ve feared all along.
Bang! Bang! It’s the long wooden sticks they use to hit, the one I’ve heard so much about. I hear the shouts of my brother, shouting for mercy, shouting at pain. I hear my parents get up frantically to try and at least save their only daughter.
But they’re too late for that; the second they step in my small room, they step in too.
The night is dark, and so is their skin. I try to make out the colors, but it’s difficult, because the only thing I see is their eyes and vicious smiles. They’re holding my parents’ arms behind their backs, making them get on their knees. One of them, the one carrying the biggest gun, steps up to me and shoves the gun in my face. I huddle further in the mattress, trying to make myself as small as possible. But the man rips away the blankets from my body, and he pushes me up, until I’m standing in front of my mother, my father, and the remnants of my brother.
“Kill them.” Says the man, trying to position my arms. My lips quiver, my eyes water, my hands tremble.
I lower my arms; I refuse to kill my mother and father.
“Kill them!” yells again the man holding me, but I shake my head frantically and point the gun elsewhere. At the window.
“No.” I whisper hoarsely, and I’m not sure if he heard me.
But he does.
The slap I receive is a proof of that; I flinch at the sound of my mother’s cries and my father’s outrage.
“Silence!” yells the soldier, and whirls me around so I’m staring right into ruthless, murdering eyes. “You will kill them, do you understand? If not, we’ll kill you.”
I decide then that if I’m going out, I might as well go out with a bam.
“Kill me then. I refuse to kill them.” I defy him, and receive another slap, this one much harder. My lip bleeds, but I barely feel it. Death is in the air.
“Don’t try to be noble. Your only choice is to kill them; if not, we’ll kill you all.” He growls, but I’m beyond caring. Images of my childhood keep replaying in my mind, reminding me of what a great life I’ve had.
“You’re wrong. We’re all going to die tonight either way, so I’m going to choose the option I can go to Heaven with, the option I can live with during my final minutes. If I kill my family, there is no redemption for me. You people are beyond saving.” I whisper, and prepare myself for the blow, but it never comes. I open an eye, trying to determine what’s happening.
One soldier has a gun to my father’s temple, other one to the temple of my mother. I squeeze my eyes shut; I have no wish to see this. I cover my ears with my hands, dropping the gun; I have no wish to hear this.
I still hear two loud pops, though, and then dead silence. I open my eyes; both momma and daddy are lying on the ground, pools of blood around them.
The awful man is in front of me, gun poised between my eyes. His eyes are cold.
“I’m ready.” I smile, because life was good and it’ll be better in Heaven.