Never Forgotten | Teen Ink

Never Forgotten

September 26, 2010
By MitchB. SILVER, Lol, Florida
MitchB. SILVER, Lol, Florida
9 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
"just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly"


On the 107th floor of the South World Trade Center, stood Drew and Kerry Thomson. As they stood on the observation deck, their gazes fixed upon New York City, the wind slowly moved around them. “It’s so…..beautiful” said Kerry, who was wrapped in her husbands arms. “Took the words out of my mouth,” he responded with a slight chuckle, “Well, we should get going, your parents are probably worried about us”. Kerry checked her watch, realizing the time was 8:40 a.m. They walked near the glass doors, leading to the elevator that would take them back to the lobby. The heated air hit them as they walked into the observation deck lobby, a calendar on the wall marked the day as September 11, 2001, next to it a clock showed a time of 8:43. “You know, I feel like walking” announced Kerry, seconds before the elevator door opened, releasing a swarm of tourists. “Honey, were on the 107th floor, that’s a long walk!”
“We could just walk to the 100th floor. How many more times are we going to come here anyways? This could be our only chance to see the stairwell.”
“We are going to be back here tomorrow, remember, I have a job interview on the 12th.”
“We should still take the stairs”
“Fine, you’re a very difficult person to negotiate with”
“I know, and that’s what you love about me!” Kerry said with a wide grin.

Slowly, they made their way through the crowds and into the stairwell, Kerry checked her watch once more 8:45, 20 minutes late. Together, they took one step in a fluid motion. Three seconds later, the building shock violently. They head screams from behind the door.

“What was that!” exclaimed Kerry, looking up passed Drew and to the door.

“I don’t know” They headed back toward the grey door, and Drew pushed it open forcefully. People gathered around the edge of the building, looking toward the north tower, smoke filled the deck.
“What’s going on?” Drew asked a person who was running to the elevator.
“A plane just hit the north tower!” the man said in between gasps. He pushed Drew’s hand off of his shoulder and continued his escape.
“Oh my god! What do we do!?” asked Kerry franticly.
“We need to get out of here, go to the stairs!” Drew yelled back over the crowds. Sirens went off down below, as well as on the observation deck. “Everyone, please exit the Top of the World Observation deck immediately by the elevators of stairs!” a voice said from a megaphone located somewhere unseen.

Screams filled the couples ears as the pushed their way through the crowd into the stairwell. The screams seemed to come from everywhere, the north tower, from below them, next to them. They were the screams of terror and death, the screams of lost souls, who had no idea the hellish fate which awaited them.

Once again, the pair found themselves in the bland brownish stairwell, but this time, instead of being overjoyed with the thought of the delicious dinner they would share whit Kerry’s parents, they were filled with terror. The clock on Kerry’s wrist indicated that the time was 9:02 am.

Together, along with a gaggle of other tourists and business people, they raced down the stairs, only making it to the 105th floor in three minutes.

With out warning, the building shuddered, much more violently than the first time, throwing them all off balance, and sending them crashing the floor. Below, they heard screams, and somewhere, deep inside the tower, many floors down, Kerry smelt the faint bitter odder of fuel and smoke….


The author's comments:
Something i thought of while watching Titanic on 9-11-09 but never got the chance to write it. I will post more later. Please comment about any changes or ways to improve!

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This article has 5 comments.


Diana101 GOLD said...
on Oct. 6 2010 at 5:52 pm
Diana101 GOLD, Grove City, Ohio
13 articles 0 photos 107 comments

Favorite Quote:
"God's delays are not God's denials"

Normally, I try to stray away from stories based on real life things,(They make me cry.) I actually really liked it. The ending left me handing! Did Drew and Kerry die? Or are they still alive? I litterally love endings like this. Please keep on writing, you have a true gift!

-Diana 101


MadiBee BRONZE said...
on Oct. 6 2010 at 3:55 pm
MadiBee BRONZE, Lancaster, New Hampshire
4 articles 0 photos 27 comments

Favorite Quote:
If at first you don't succeed, you are running about average.
- M.H. Anderson

sad made me remember all the people lost on 911. but SPELLING! and dialogue needs some work. but great! when they are approved can you give me some feed back on my two peoms?

on Oct. 5 2010 at 3:07 pm
mudpuppy BRONZE, Orangeburg, South Carolina
2 articles 0 photos 475 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is like a box of cheese and flower petal sometimes it's soft and sweet, sometimes it just plain stinks. - M.J.

I agree with apocalyptigirl, I would like to know also if the couple made it out alive or not. I can tell you I have never read historical fiction on this subject yet. Nice work. :)

on Oct. 4 2010 at 11:17 pm
apocalyptigirl BRONZE, Staunton, Virginia
4 articles 2 photos 285 comments

Favorite Quote:
"DON'T PANIC." ~from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

This is certainly a moving topic to write about. I like how you established the relationship between the husband and wife. The main issue here is grammar, spelling, and punctuation. You should punctuate dialogue/things in the " "? The best way to learn how to correctly punctuate dialogue is to read and see how it's done in books. For the spelling errors, I suggest spellcheck. (example: "franticly" should be "frantically.") Are there more parts? I'd like to know if they get out ok or not.

on Oct. 4 2010 at 9:19 pm
AgnotTheOdd GOLD, Aptos, California
17 articles 0 photos 315 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The reason for your unreasonable treatment of my reason so enfeebles my reason that I have reason to complain of your reason" ~ Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra

Interesting concept.  It's certainly very sad.  Dialogue seems realistic enough (for the most part).

I dont really think this writing style is for me though

J7X