Oh Alan, there is no happiness without tears and no life without death. Everyone dies, and today is your day.

“Ma’am?” Ellie was startled to the sound of another voice. “Would you like some booze now?” the dull bartender said.

“Um,” Ellie hesitated. “Not yet. He’s on his way.” She gave an embarrassed smile to the bartender who nodded her head and walked off, leaving Ellie to sit alone in silence for a few minutes. Everyone dies, and today is your day, she thought. It was a phrase that haunted her for thirteen years. There is no happiness without tears and no life without death.

“Do my eyes deceive me, or is that really you, squirt?” staring down on Ellie was a tall man, smiling, and over the years he seemed to have developed a rotund beer belly.

“Tom!” she exclaimed. “It’s so great to see you.” Ellie stood up and gave Tom a great big hug.

“My, it’s been years, squirt,” his eyes looked worn and tired. “You are just beautiful!” just then his tone sank deep, full of sorrow. “You look just like your old man.”

Ellie lowered her eyes in pain, “So I’ve been told.” The two took their seats and ordered some drinks to start them off.

“I’ll have a Margarita, frozen, extra salt,” said Tom. “And she’ll have-“

“An apple martini please,” Ellie chimed in. Tom started to laugh.

“Jesus. Last time I saw ya’ you were seventeen hadn’t had a lick of liquor. It’s crazy how time flies.”

Ellie smiled, “I can still remember my dad’s favorite drink. God, he loved going to bars with you and the guys.”

Tom’s voice was calm, “You gotta stop livin’ in the past, El.”

“I try, really I do. But sometimes it’s just so damned impossible. Everywhere I look, everything I do- it reminds me of him.”

“C’mon squirt, you’ve got to remember the good times,” Tom took another sip of his margarita. “The two of you shared a special bond that could never be broken.”

“But it was, Tom,” her voice was stern. “Someone decided to break it for us.” Oh Alan. Everyone dies. Ellie looked down at her drink. The apples danced around in the martini. An awkward silence fell between the two.

Tom sighed. “Remember that one time,” he stopped to chuckle. “Remember the day of your dance recital? I think you were in first grade or somethin’. Anyway, you were terrified! Just plain terrified to dance in front of the audience alone.” Ellie’s eyes glistened to the thought of the old memory. She started a smile which eventually sprouted into a laugh.

“My dad flung himself up onto the stage and started to dance next to me! He was always the best at embarrassing himself, but somehow that always made me feel better.” Oh Alan, there is no happiness without tears and no life without death. Everyone dies, and today is your day. Ellie’s ear to ear smile suddenly faded and her twinkling eyes dimmed. She couldn’t help that those haunting words raced through her mind every time she thought of her father. In fact, those repeated words were the last words her father heard before the killer ended his life. She knew that because Ellie had been with him that horrid night.

“Tom,” Ellie glanced back up. “You were so good to me and my mother after he died.” Tom took her hand in his. “I want to thank you, for everything you did,”

“He was my best friend. I wish I could have done more,” he replied. His sparkling eyes were entangled with a sliver of regret.

“Oh, Tom, god no. Don’t you dare wish that! You did everything you could to help. My family was falling apart, and you helped put us back together,” she assured. “I mean for pete’s sake, you made us dinner almost every night, and signed my mom up for therapy.”

“How is your mom doing these days anyway?” Tom chimed in.

“She’s absolutely great,” Ellie smiled a warm, generous smile. “Without that therapy she would have crumbled in all that grief. You helped us in a way you’ll never understand.” Ellie paused. Her expression turned dull and worried. “Tom?” He gazed at her. She tightly clenched her jaw and took a second to think. “Does it ever cross your mind that the man who killed my father is still running free?” Tom took a while to digest the question. It was rare for him to be open about his best friend’s murder.

“Of course it does. Almost every single goddamn day of my life.” He briefly stopped and a curious expression ran across his face. “Why would you ask that, Ellie?” Ellie glanced down at the table and started to nervously tap it with her fingers.
“I’ve never told anybody…” she paused and glanced back at Tom. “I’ve never told anybody, but on the night my father was murdered…” her eyes jetted to her drink then back to him, and a quick sigh escaped her lungs. “I was there,” she blurted out. Tom’s face tightened and he put his margarita down.

“What do you mean you were there?” he questioned sternly.

Ellie took a deep breath. “Well,” she started. “I ran to hide in my room after the murderer entered our house. I remember the pitter patter of rain on our roof. I couldn’t see well, but I peeped through the crack of my door.” Her hand began to shake. “I saw a man,” her voice quivered. “Not just any man. I saw my dad’s killer.”

Tom’s eyes were wide, “Did you see anything else?”

Ellie shook her head, “No it was too dark and my eyes were blurry with tears. I remember seeing his silhouette standing over my dad and-” Oh Alan. She closed her eyes and shook the phrase out of her head.

Tom’s expression was still distraught, “El, are you sure? Like one hundred percent positive you didn’t see anything but his shadow. I mean, this is serious. He could be caught.” Ellie noticed a mad look glaze over his eyes and his hands were shaking, and she suddenly felt uneasy.

“Well yeah,” she said. “If I had seen his face I would know who murdered him.” She shook her head. “I just felt so helpless watching from a distance. He was my dad, my best friend and I should have done something.”

“You were only nine, Ellie.”

“I’m gonna find that man someday, and when I do, I’m gonna make sure he knows exactly what he took from me.” Conflicted, her blue eyes filled with tears. Tom then reached toward her and wiped her tears from her cheeks.

“Oh, Ellie,” he said. His voice carried an unsettling yet tranquil tone. “There is no happiness without tears and no life without death,” Ellie froze, “Everyone dies.” and at that moment, she felt her heart skip a beat.