Alone | Teen Ink

Alone

May 29, 2018
By Epril GOLD, Sellersville, Pennsylvania
Epril GOLD, Sellersville, Pennsylvania
16 articles 7 photos 0 comments

As a child you slept in a room with your parents. You were shuttled from one crowded room to another. Even at night as you lay in bed before your parents, you were never truly alone. There was always someone around the bend, behind the wall. You couldn't scream for fear of others misunderstanding, always listening, always there.
As a teenager you slept in a room alone, but your parents were behind the wall. You came home from the crowded school on a stuffy bus. You never were alone, even if the silence of the night might give you that illusion. You couldn't scream for fear of others fearing the dark, always listening, always there.
As a young adult you lived in an apartment. You had office work as a job, where you sat in a small cubicle with the illusion of privacy until you yourself spied someone else. The apartment has thin walls, with an old couple behind them. They have complained about you clicking on keyboards at night. You couldn't scream for fear of others being drawn from their illusion of isolation, always listening, always there.
As a middle aged adult you lived in a house, alone. You may seem alone, but you can hear your neighbors every moment of the night. You know all of their secrets. You are disturbed when you realize that they can hear you just as much. You have that illusion of isolation, from the empty, echoing walls to the silence when everyone is at their work. But truly they are a gasping breath away. You couldn't scream for fear of others hearing you as you hear them, always listening, always there.
Now you struggle for breath as you finally sit on this incredible void. This emptiness around you right after the last switch is flicked inside you. The walls don't exist anymore, no one hears you. And finally alone, you scream. You scream like there's no end in sight, which there isn't, not anymore. And you hear distant souls howl out alongside you. For now you are free. Until you hear the others stop, and so do you. Because now, when you're truly alone, you're afraid, no, terrified, of the silence that will meet your screams.



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