Once upon a time in a pasture far, far away. There lived a cow named Ramón. Ramón was a lazy sort of cow because everyday he would wake up and know that he was going to do the same thing that he did yesterday. Just stand, eat, and sleep. So one day he was thinking, “I’ve got to do something about this laziness.” So the next morning, he did. He entered himself in the Boston Marathon. He started his training sessions right away. He started eating less fattening cud and started on the low-fat cud instead. Also, he started running on the treadmill as much as possible. So it was low-fat food, treadmill, sleep. That was his whole day now. So after about 28 weeks of consecutive training, it was race time. The world’s top runners entered this race. He was the only non-human out there, and the pressure was starting to get to him. But then, all of a sudden he heard a loud “moooooo!!!” from the field across from the starting line. It was his momma. Seeing her really gave him a boost of pride and encouragement. So, when the race official shot his gun to begin the race, Ramón shot out of the gates like a bullet. People say that cows can’t fly, but boy; it sure looked like Ramón was flying. Because of his great pride and great training sessions, he was able to finish with an arousing time of 1 hour, 12 minutes, and 34 seconds. He took home the gold and set an un-lazy example, for cows across the globe.