Forever | Teen Ink


December 19, 2009
By Lovestonedloser GOLD, Orlando, Florida
Lovestonedloser GOLD, Orlando, Florida
17 articles 0 photos 65 comments

Favorite Quote:
If your always looking down, you'll never see the beauty of the stars.

I stood in front of the seemingly endless hallway.
It’s long golden carpet going on for days; it’s startlingly beautiful silver chandlers, its many rows of tables with bright crimson table clothes and blue roses lining the room.
And the many smiling and or frowning, envious faces of those I know.
My name is Alexandra crownwell and I’m about to be branded…marked for forever.
Mr. Jameson; a friend of my fathers and also the leader of this ceremony approached where I stood on the stage, I wore a sterling silver dress that fell a little beyond my knees but clung to my body quite nicely. I wore my long dark hair down, gracefully parted over both my shoulders and my makeup was glittery and silver to accommodate my dress.
I wore heels for the first time in a long time; the long silver straps went half way up my leg and the heel on it made me at least three inches taller.
The music that was being played by a pianist in the background stopped and the room hung silent. I looked straight back, trying to ignore the hundreds of people now staring at me and Mr. Jameson ushered me towards him. I swallowed hard and hesitantly walked over to the middle of the stage, and stood on his left, many cameras flashed and I was surprised the glare didn’t blind me.

“Friends, family, and fellow members of this earth” Mr. Jameson started with, he mused at the chuckles he got from some of the audience “We are all here on the glorious day to celebrate a day we’ve all be waiting for” he turned to look at me and smiled, the smile didn’t exactly creep me out, just made me uncomfortable. “We are here to celebrate Alexandra becoming a guardian at long last” the crowd started to erupt into applause and I felt blood fill my cheeks. “Now because of her morals she inherited from her mother” My own eyes as well as lots of others fallowed my mother in the middle of the room, she blushed scarlet and gave a simple wave “She refuses to have her mark done by her former instructor, instead she has chosen to have a friend, a lover if you will and also the person she will be guarding, do her marks for her” he smiled at me again and raised his voice so everyone could defiantly hear him “Mr. Jessie Ashford” one of the spotlights averted from me and landed on him…the utter perfection that was my best friend…my forever.
He wore a crimson dress shirt that matched the table cloths and black dress jeans, his hair was swept back over his eyes and he walked towards the stage, the blood burning in his cheeks.
“Now as I mentioned; Mr. Ashford is going to be Alexandra’s charge after tonight, she has been training as a guardian for almost two years now and gained her charge earlier this summer” this was true. Jessie and I have been best friends for a long time, and became romantically entangled recently, he was an Ashford, which was a powerful, magical family which meant he would be assigned a guardian at a young age, I on the other hand…had guardian blood running threw my veins.

Mr. Jameson handed Jessie a small dagger; its diamond incrusted handle, sterling silver blade, and white light shine, Has done its part to give many guardians there marks.
Jessie stood behind me; gently running his finger tips down my spine with a smile, “Now Mr. Ashford, I want you to repeat after me as you slowly give Alexandra her mark of promise”.
Jessie swallowed and nodded his head; he slowly swept the hair away from my neck and positioned the tip on my skin. “I Jessie Alexander Ashford”
Jessie Gulped and gently stuck the daggers tip into my skin; I whimpered gently and in the corner of my eye I’d seen Jessie’s face go Pale “I Jessie Alexander Ashford”
“Promise to always in trust you with my life”
Jessie brought his lips to my ear as he dug the next line into my neck; his voice turned soothing…he was trying to subside the pain “Promise to always in trust you with my life” his voice was determined and I felt his other hand come to my own and rub gently.
“Now Alexandra, repeat after me” the room went silent for a while and I felt a drop of my blood drip down my neck into the back of my dress “I Alexandra Nicole Crownwell”
I swallowed back tears as the wound burned “I Alexandra Nicole Crownwell”
Mr. Jameson nodded to Jessie as he dug another line into my neck, the mark wasn’t big but it had to be done slowly “Promise to care for and protect Jessie Alexander Ashford with my life”
This part I didn’t have trouble saying; even before finding out I would be Jessie’s guardian I promised to protect him, I caught his gaze in the corner of my eye “Promise to care for and Protect Jessie Alexander Ashford with my life” Jessie cut another little line into my skin and I felt another drop of blood run down my dress.

“Now being this is a romantic doing, I want you both to repeat after me” me and Jessie both gave small nods.
“I will always remain in your life”
Jessie added another line and I squeezed my eyes shut for a small moment “I will always remain in your life” We said in synchronization and my heart thumped at the words.
“I will never go away” Jessie finished and brought the blade away from my skin to replace it with a cool towel.
“I will never go away” we said again together as I was turned to face Jessie, His eyes looked sickened about what he just had to do, but they also burned with passion…desire.
“I will always remain by your side”
Jessie bit his lower lip and grabbed my hand; lacing his fingers with my own.
“I will always remain by your side” we repeated robotically as we held each others gaze, another guardian came to and took the cool towel from my skin, and my new mark burned against the air.
Mr. Jameson smiled “And I will remain yours forever” this wasn’t said at every initiation, only ones like my own and my mothers…who had romantic partners do their mark.
Jessie smiled and squeezed my hand softly “And I will remain yours forever” we both repeated and I bowed my head. Luke warm water wash over me causing my hair to go limp and wash the blood off my skin.
Mr. Jameson nodded and the crowd went into heavy applause; Jessie…Normally being the shy one, pulled me up against him and pressed his lips softly to mine. Forgetting about the newly burning mark, and the hundreds of people staring at us. I kissed him back, gently caressing the side of his face. With the crowd still going crazy Jessie brought his lips to my ear with a smile, I felt his hand trace my arm and he whispered “Forever” the smile was contagious and spread across my face, he squeezed me in his arms “Forever you are mine”

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This article has 16 comments.

bayleem GOLD said...
on Mar. 22 2010 at 2:57 pm
bayleem GOLD, Yarmouth, Maine
10 articles 0 photos 32 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Best Friends are like bras: close to your heart and there for support.”

WOW this was amazing!

on Mar. 2 2010 at 12:21 pm
katieholden SILVER, Rochester, Massachusetts
8 articles 0 photos 1 comment
Very well done, your writing carries easily with its unique storyline in addition to your excellent description. The combination of love and utter commitment we get introduced to almost immediately mixing with this sick ritual makes you feel the inability to stop reading until the end. I really enjoyed this and I would definitely say continue developing this piece. :) Thank you for your comments and opinions on my piece too.

Anita PLATINUM said...
on Feb. 24 2010 at 7:28 pm
Anita PLATINUM, Santa Cruz, California
20 articles 0 photos 36 comments
Wow... I really, really like this. You have such a unique and wonderful voice. Very, very nice.

JessiPierce said...
on Feb. 12 2010 at 8:06 am
Wow. I like this story...alot!. It's very interesting and well discribed. Please post more.

on Feb. 7 2010 at 6:11 pm
pfeferminz SILVER, Sebastopol, California
9 articles 0 photos 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
Everyone has the right to be stupid but some people abuse the privilege......

WOW!! that was awesome! its really unique :)

thanx for commenting on my story btw :)

on Feb. 7 2010 at 2:12 pm
ShyeGirlBeth GOLD, Easley, South Carolina
18 articles 16 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
Kick The Darkness Till It Bleeds Daylight, Not Mine, But I Love The Saying....; When life gives you lemons, throw them at other people and yell "Make some stinkin lemonade!"; Otay!

That was awsome. Very good.

on Feb. 5 2010 at 2:22 pm
TessaGraves394 BRONZE, South Haven, Michigan
1 article 0 photos 10 comments
I think it's wonderful. The only mistake I could find was an incomplete sentence (I think it was "Forgetting the the burning mark on my neck"). I personally think you should continue this!

on Feb. 4 2010 at 11:49 am
StanHubertson, Oak Park, Illinois
0 articles 0 photos 29 comments
Strange. I liked your writing and I felt that it moved fluidly. However, I think you should branch out. Writing about Love over and over again can get rather humdrum. If you would write about topics which do not interest you as much it would help you grow into your own style and theme. Keep up the good work.

on Feb. 2 2010 at 8:28 pm
Forever-darkness BRONZE, Hartford, Arkansas
4 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I trust everyone. I just don't trust the devil inside them."
Troy Kennedy-Martin

I love the story but it reminds me a little too much on 'Vampire Academy'. I don't want you to get the wrong idea but the story was amazing. I enjoyed it very much.

Read2Write said...
on Feb. 1 2010 at 12:13 pm
That was truly amazing! I spotted a few spelling errors but besides that... just splendid:) I would agree that if you continued to write this story, I would definitely read it! Keep up the good work!

on Jan. 30 2010 at 9:26 pm
dancemaniac565 BRONZE, Fairfield, Connecticut
2 articles 0 photos 4 comments
Amazing decscription, especially in the beginning. So romantic, very well done.

on Jan. 29 2010 at 10:26 am
Alpha-Lyrae GOLD, Toronto, ON, Other
13 articles 3 photos 37 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I've loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night." -Galileo Galilei
"In the Beginning, the universe was created. This made a lot of people angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move." -Douglas Adams

Very well written, very romantic....haha, nicely done.

on Jan. 28 2010 at 4:38 pm
SilverLuna SILVER, _________, Washington
8 articles 0 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Come fairies take me out of this dull world, for I would ride with you upon the wind and dance upon the mountains like a flame.".... W.B. Yeats.
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss." - Douglas Adams

Wow, i really liked this piece. It was so romantic, yet intensly intriguing as to what their world is like!(: Please read more o fmy work and comment.

on Jan. 27 2010 at 10:21 pm
Lovestonedloser GOLD, Orlando, Florida
17 articles 0 photos 65 comments

Favorite Quote:
If your always looking down, you'll never see the beauty of the stars.

I thank you both for your comments and Opinions. But i must ask about the grammar Issue. All my work goes threw at least three Grammar checkers and this piece my english teacher looked over and said he seen no Grammer problems. So to help me in the future could you give me an idea about what your talking about?. I value all Opinions and i thank you for posting yours.

on Jan. 27 2010 at 9:24 pm
Miss_Bliss GOLD, Waban, Massachusetts
17 articles 0 photos 31 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If we did all the things we were capable of, we would literally astound ourselves."

-Thomas Edison

This was interesting; if you made a full story out of it, I would most definitely read more. Biggest word of advice: work on your grammar. I know many a story that sounds amazing when read aloud, but looks like a complete mess on the page. Don't let your writing become that way! You have a lot of potential, and in your situation using improper grammar is like using bad English during a job interview: it will cause many people to become disinterested in your writing before they have even read it. Get your ideas out there--by doing so, you're doing us all a service!--but make them easy to read and understand. Your ideas are good--you just need to make them more accessible. Keep up the good work!

on Jan. 26 2010 at 11:32 pm
mercantile BRONZE, New Gloucester, Maine
3 articles 0 photos 47 comments
I actually really liked this piece. It was a cool idea, and based on what else I read of yours, I didn't expect this from you, which is always a positive. However, sometimes you need to step back and look at how this could look from different perspectives. For example, if she's his guardian, she wouldn't be even the slightest bit bothered by small cuts on her neck. One can't be expected to protect someone if tiny, ritualistic nicks on the neck make one flinch and burn. Also, one wouldn't expect such a fixation on such highly feminine and fancy clothing from someone in a stereotypically masculine position. And grammar, grammar, grammar. If you decide on those little details, this could be a very, very strong piece :)