I could hear my heart in my ears as i walked out to Gage's car and saw his head on the steering wheel. Everything surrounding me blurred. I got myself ready for what he was going to tell me. I opened his car door, and stared at him. His hands were tightly gripped around the steering wheel and his whole body was shaking while he choked on his tears. This was the first time I had ever seen him cry. Gage was so strong in everything he did, and always hid his tears away from the world, even himself.
"Gage?" I whispered.
"He's gone," was all he could handle. I knew then exactly what he was talking about. He took a deep breath and tried again.
"He's gone, I don't have a dad, I'll never be a fathers son again." He pulled up and looked at the roof of his car, took a deep breath, then clawed his face with his hands, and banged his head on the steering wheel. I stopped him and put my hand on his back while i felt the arch of it rise, fall, and jump. Before i said anything, he started again.
"Hes dead, hes gone, I've sung my song, a fathers son i am no more. son without a father, forever more. His body is gone, his love resides. The tears still flow the pain i hide with lies. For what is lost, what will come?"
He had a piece of paper resting on his legs, reading straight from it. He looked up from the paper, into my face.
"I wrote it today, i keep running the lines over and over again in my head." He stopped and closed his eyes, the grip he had on the steering wheel got stronger. I knew the words to say, but i didn't know if it was the right time to say them. I shuffled my feet, then stopped myself, placing my hand on his back again.
"I don't know the pain your going through," I began. "I don't know the intensity of it, the anguish that you feel. But i do know through all of this is something beautiful, something bigger than us, something out of our control." I paused, searching for the words to comfort him.
"Sometimes things come our way that we don't know how to handle. things are thrown at us from no where. our lives can change dramatically in a matter of a day, an hour, a minute. But we have to learn to prosper forward, to continue life even when its unbearable. We have to learn to let go. let go and free ourselves from the ground, releasing our spirits, and never looking down." Gage lifted his face up and i felt his pain, my heart ached for his. He got out of the car, and wrapped his arms around me. I embraced him back while he cried into my shoulder. I could feel the hurt of his agony leaking off onto me, my heart felt twisted and broken for his.
"Please, " he said through his tears. "Please never leave. Don't let go. All my life I have given up on people. Or more, they have given up on me. but you...." he took a deep breath and tried to stop his panting. "you, i can't loose you too." I pulled away from his grip, and looked at him, staring into his eyes contemplating my next words.
"I'm not going anywhere."